Numerical Analysis
by Yamazakura
Summary: They say University years are the best in your life. True, maybe, but not when your godfather has problems with the police, your friends are novice hackers and there's a bunch of streetracers ogling you. Love? Don't even mention! SasuNaru, AU
1. Prologue

**Last week my friend Roy and me (and some other guys as well ) went to watch "The fast and the furious: Tokyo Drift" That was a funny movie, I liked it. Afterwards, going home, I got this idea. Then Roy helped me to shape and perfect it. Half the praise goes to him.**

**So - okay. I did some major reasearch about Japan, the University of Tokyo and cars/bikes/even quads. Hope it'll make the story more interesting! **

**WARNING:  
Ratings are not for show, kids, as in this story you'll find:  
- a lot of swearing;  
- violence;  
- huge amount of technical detailes about cars;****  
and more importantly (as it tends to peeve people most of all)  
- shounen ai motives.**

**I have to remark, that there won't be any japanese talking in the story. The characters are japanese by default and I don't see the nessessity of underlining it by random phrases. Though the suffixeswill stay, of course, as it's a huge part of japanese culture.**

**So now I shut up and move to the story. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: if I owned Naruto, I would have been a 40years old japanese man. Don't actually mind 'japanese man', but 40 years old... **

* * *

_Hey! Give me a listen,  
__You corpses of cheer!  
__At least those of you  
__Who still got an ear.  
__I'll tell you a story  
__Make a skeleton cry  
__Of our own jubilisciously lovely Corpse Bride! _

_Danny Elfman, 'Remains of the day'

* * *

_

**Prologue**

The arrival hall of Haneda airport was packed with people to the point when a fly wiling to land wouldn't be able to find a suitable surface. It was nothing to be surprised about – the date was 26th of March, Sunday evening and people, obliged to go to work the next day, were coming back to Tokyo from different places throughout the country, where they had spent the weekend. Plus, of course, the new academic year was going to start at 1st of April (1), which only increased the amount of people coming to Tokyo.

When passengers of plane from Okinawa started merging with the crowd, desperately trying to get to their baggage, the place was more resembling Arabic bazaar than an airport. Only a few not bothering about bags and cases went straight towards the exit.

Having finally made his way through the green corridor, Naruto yet again drowned in a sea of unfamiliar faces and bright holiday clothes. He himself wasn't much different - orange tee-shirt, baggy jeans and baseball cap stamped him as one of their kind. The good point was that he easily found lone figure of a man in black costume and sunglasses, with hair tied in a high ponytail.

"Iruka!" he nearly dropped his bag, rushing to the man's wide open arms. "God, I missed you so much!"

"So did I, Naruto, so did I!" Umino Iruka, Naruto's godfather and, more importantly, best friend, hugged him tightly, as if trying to squeeze out his soul.

They stood there for several minutes, not knowing where to start, what to say first, until Iruka laughed shortly and led Naruto to the parking lot.

"How was the flight?"

"Disastrous. I wasn't able to get a busyness-class ticket and was stuck with noisy kids and their annoying parents for two hours and a half!" Iruka chuckled and patted Naruto's head.

"I'd rather say they were stuck with you!"

"Hey!"

"Now, don't tell me you were a good boy, I won't believe anyway." Naruto fumed angrily and even started saying something, when quiet beeping of the car in front of him attracted his attention. He didn't even notice when they exited the airport, so much he was absorbed with their little chat.

"Yours?" he asked Iruka unsurely.

"Yeah."

Naruto threw Iruka an unbelieving look.

"Subaru Legacy?" for all he knew about his godfather – and he knew about him _everything_, even though they hadn't seen each other for three years (but hey, what MSN and phones are for?), - this car didn't suit him _at all_. It was more or less expensive, yes; sleek and smooth, like a drop of quicksilver, maybe even charming… but it wasn't a car Iruka would drive. Naruto turned to him, raising eyebrows.

"What?" Iruka shuddered under his look. "Oh, you don't like it?"

"It's not that I don't like it… It doesn't suit you – as I see it." Iruka stared at him.

"What are you talking about? Ah, you mean - hey, come on! I'm thirty three already! I'm not into _that stuff_ anymore." He rolled eyes, and got into the car. "Come on, we'd better hurry, if you don't want to spend next couple of hours stuck into traffic jam!"

Naruto shrugged his daze off and took his seat.

"So, what's new since I called you last time?"

"It was this morning? Hmm, let's see…"

'_Okay, Tokyo! The Great Uzumaki Naruto is coming and you have no say in it rather than accept me with arms wide open!"_

_

* * *

_When they finally made their way to Roppongi (2), it was almost half past two in the morning. And while Naruto, tired from the flight, wished for a shower and a bed only, he couldn't stop his interest from adverting to vast amount of night clubs and bars. He hadn't been to Tokyo for three years, since he last visited Iruka; and at the age of fifteen, although being very much interested in Roppongi nightlife, he hadn't got a chance to get to know it, since that time Iruka lived in the suburbs. 

"We're living in Roppongi Pacific Tower," Iruka said pointing to a building a little aside from the main road. "If you get lost or something…"

"Will you be reminding me of that time for all my life?" Naruto interrupted, looking scandalized. Well, in fact, he himself suspected that he suffered a 'rare genetic disease' called topographic cretinism but he'd rather die than admit it, since the only case he actually told Iruka about was now sort of a family treasure, mentioned whenever suitable (and not suitable as well).

They parked and Iruka, after giving keys to the concierge, led him inside the building. Up close it looked more like a skyscraper, though it couldn't be more than thirty stories.

"We live at the twenty-second floor; the parking is in the basement. By the way, your bike was brought this afternoon."

"Oh, great! Other things?" elevator was rapidly taking them higher.

"As well. God, you sure have got a hell lot of technique. What for do you need four computers anyway?"

"I'm not going to study Computer Science for nothing." Naruto rolled eyes, exiting the elevator. Iruka turned to the left of two present on the floor apartments, snatching keys out of his pocket.

They went in and Naruto absentmindedly noticed that the apartment was nothing of the usual Japanese style – Iruka, contrary to nation's subconscious desire for large space, actually having this space, filled it with large amount of furniture – drawers, closets and chairs.

"It's cozy," he reassured his godfather, finally taking his baseball cap off, hearing Iruka exhale aloud at the mock of blond hair. His grandfather was a half-Swedish American soldier, who stayed in Japan after the World War II; from him both Naruto's father Arashi and he inherited unusual for a Japanese look. Living in Okinawa, a center of tourist attraction, he didn't get as much attention as he would, had he lived anywhere else. Now, when he moved to Tokyo, it was going to change. Sure, Tokyo was a big city, the capital, but foreigners still weren't all that welcome and Naruto knew that with his looks he would always be recognized as a foreigner. Two years back he even seriously considered idea of dying his hair black, but tossed it away in the end.

Iruka came up to him and ruffled golden locks with a sad smile.

"Want to drink something?"

"Nah, thanks, I'll just have shower and then go to bed. 'M really tired."

"'Kay. Your room is that one. The bathroom is over there. If you need anything – just ask." Naruto nodded and retreated to the bathroom. He hated moments like this. Couple of seconds spared on mourning over his pitiful skills at socializing and then he'd feel like an utter idiot for the rest of the day.

"Why 'like'? I sure am an idiot." He sighed warily and took his tee-shirt off, when he suddenly realized that the bag with all the clothes he took along was left in the car.

"Oh, crap!" he rushed out of the bathroom. Was Iruka still up? Desperately looking around, trying to understand where his godfather's room could be, he suddenly spotted the keys. "Right. There and back again." He put his running shoes on, not even bothering about laces, took Iruka's jacket, lying on the chair at the door and ran out of the apartment. The elevator took him down to the parking, where he, shivering from cold – it was March night, for God's sake, and he wore only Iruka's jacket and his summer pants! – tried to find his godfather's Subaru.

"Let's see, let's see…" Luckily for him, the parking was almost empty, and he soon spotted what he was searching for.

His bag was lying at the passenger seat and he opened the car hastily, reaching for it. But Naruto could never be called graceful, and during this act, he managed to slip on dry concrete floor and fall. And while falling, he somehow managed to crack the glove compartment open and bump his head against the roof. Hissing and rubbing injured head, he turned slightly to close the compartment, and froze at the sight of what was inside.

There, was lying a whole metallic hill of sets of keys. Car keys. You can't recognize a car by its keys, but the key-chains showed distinctly – Lamborghini, Nissan and Jaguar were at Iruka's possession as well as two other unknown cars, as their keys wore no signs.

It could mean only one thing – Iruka had lied. "I'm thirty three already! I'm not into _that stuff_ anymore." He had said several hours ago at the airport. And he was persuading Naruto in it during three years prior.

"Iruka, you motherfucker!" Naruto whispered, eyeing the keys unbelievingly.

"Excuse me, mister…" he heard someone calling him and turned around hurriedly, shutting the glove compartment closed.

"Yes?" there stood the parking guard, a young boy in police clothes.

"Ah… May I help you?" what did he want from him?

"No, everything is fine." Naruto reassured the boy warily, too his bag and went to the elevator.

He didn't feel that happy about his moving to Tokyo. This way or other he would have to face thing he didn't want to face. _Again_. Thanks to Iruka. Yeah.

* * *

(1) In Japan, contrary to other contries, academic year starts on 1st of April.  
(2) Roppongi is a street in Tokyo, the center of city's nighlife. Roppongi Pacific Tower actually exists.

Let me know what you think, guys:shy smile:


	2. Good bad company and urban legends

**Thank you for the comments, guys! They were really sweet! My vacation ended and it wasn't as bad I was saying. The first chapter is down here and I hope you'll like it. Best regards!  
Disclaimer: had I owned Naruto, I'd never had free time to write fanfics. On the other hand, would I need fanfics?****

* * *

****Chapter one. Good bad company and urban legends.

* * *

**

_'Daddy, why is it that you rotate the wheel slowly, but the car is moving fast?'_

_little me to my dad

* * *

_

Graduate school of Information Science and Technology of the University of Tokyo was located in Hongo campus, not too far from Roppongi.

When on 1st of April Naruto entered Hongo, he felt a little bit nervous about what was ahead. It was excited worry - hell no he was going to run back to Okinawa weeping because of a moment of uneasiness after exhausting flight! He knew too well about Iruka's 'little hobby' and knew how important it was to him; he decided to act as if he didn't know anything. Had he spoken about the revelation with his godfather, it'd undoubtedly result in Iruka quitting it. And Naruto although wishing he would, didn't want to use any kind of pressure. Iruka had nothing to do with his personal issues that since recently stood against anything connected with cars; Naruto was grateful that Iruka wanted to keep him calm. So, in best traditions of Scarlett O'Hara he decided to postpone the thinking and dived into exciting rush of moving and getting ready for upcoming studies.

Naruto, even though had seen the map before, didn't expect Hongo to be as huge as it was and realized immediately he could easily get lost. Luckily, he spotted a bus, which as papers given by administration said was passing by the 8th Engineering Building, where Department of Computer Science resided.

All of little space around that building that could be used for parking was filled with cars, dark and similar, as if cloned. Naruto thanked God he was on bike, but there wasn't a place for his blue Kawasaki either! He had to drive down the street until he reached buildings of the Faculty of Law. Surprisingly, cars there though not so vast in number were a hell lot more expensive. Naruto, despite inner disapproval of himself, spent almost five minutes ogling shiny black Mercedes SLK (1), fluid and sexy (and please, don't ask, how can a car be sexy. It was), before he realized that he was almost late and ran back to his current alma mater.

One could be surprised that Naruto, only eighteen and not too smart by his looks, was able to enter a graduate school. And actually, he _had _been going to apply for one of the Faculty of Engineering departments, but by chance took exams for Computer Science, passed them easily and decided to stick with it without wasting time on general and mostly useless knowledge. Ah, come on, even a seven-year-old can do programming nowadays!

"Even a seven-year-old can do programming nowadays... Can't he?" Naruto muttered pitifully, standing in the doorway.

It was like a dream. A very-very bad dream. First day, and Saturday moreover, there was supposed to be just one lecture called "Introduction to the subject of Computer Science" and organizing explanations. But, dear God, were future programmers supposed to look like _that_? 'Kay, maybe his mental image of one was influenced by TV and Internet - he had been sure that programmers were messy, oblivious, overflowed with crazy ideas of creating artificial intellect and hacking Pentagon once a week at least (not that he once succeeded but nonetheless). But! In the auditorium there were about forty people, all past their thirty and all wearing costumes and ties, closed laptops resting on individual desks before them. Graduate School, yes, but what the hell?

"Not in Japan, boy." Naruto turned around to find three dark-haired (duh!) guys of approximately the same age as him and in similarly neutral clothes - white shirts, dark jeans and jackets. One of them, with fang-like red marks on his cheeks (yep, finally a normal punk!), continued: "'M Kiba, this," he pointed at the guy with hair tied in high ponytail, "is Shikamaru, and this", he waved in the direction of the other, looking fat near those slim two, "is Chouji. We're the only decent people in this nut house."

"Naruto." they shook hands. "So, what the hell is going on? Did I get lost?"

Kiba laughed ("On the road of life, dude!") and poked Shikamaru, who sighed and said wearily:

"All of us had enough brainpower to pass exams to enter here, but not enough to guess it's not called 'graduate school' for nothing. Guys there inside are 'company soldiers'; they are sent here to raise qualification or for similarly shitty reason."

Naruto glanced into the auditorium again to notice almost every one of people there was reading 'Forbes' (2) and moaned.

* * *

"I would like to eat some bread, have a fuck and go to bed!" sang Kiba, paying no attention to Naruto, who choked on these words and was coughing intensely. "What? I love bread!" 

"Spend more time with him and you'll start considering words 'want' and 'have' in only one meaning..." Chouji rolled eyes, diving into the package he held for another chip. Naruto laughed. His new friends had known each other for quite a long time, since they had attended the same school, but he didn't feel left out. And yes - one lousy boring lecture and he was up to calling these guys his best friends. Seriously, that hour and twenty could have been disastrous for Naruto's fragile health of studies ditcher if not various dirty remarks from Kiba and Chouji's translation of Shika's meaningful hums.

"So, where are we?" Naruto asked. Stupid question - he had spent the past week driving around the city to get used to its crazy traffic, so he knew they were somewhere near Roppongi, even though it was hard to believe that this dark quiet alley had anything to do with bright and noisy street.

"At the threshold of the 'Rusty wheel'!" Kiba proclaimed proudly. "The funkiest place in whole Tokyo, I swear on my manhood!" Wo-ha. Naruto wasn't that much of a party animal; back in Okinawa he had only visited several parties before circumstances put an end to his petty private life. So funkiest or not, this was going to be fun, right? With a sigh Chouji passed the chips to Shikamaru, who was sitting behind him on the motorcycle, and drove further into the alley. Two hundred meters after he slowed his black Gilera Nexus 250 down at the backdoor of a tower-like building, letting Shikamaru jump off. Kiba gritted his grip on Naruto and mentioned his mother (not in a good way, of course), when he sped up a little and then suddenly hit the brakes, so the back wheel broke contact with asphalt.

"Do it again and you're dead, fuck!" Inuzuka warned, voice scandalized and scared at the same time. Chouji laughed.

Meanwhile Shika was bumping on the metallic door. It cracked open for a second, he said something and looked back at them, motioning to drive further. The scene made Naruto chuckle - so much it reminded of old American and Italian movies about mafia. It felt like they were going to enter yakuza's hideout. And of course he wasn't stupid enough to think that 'the funkiest place in whole Tokyo' was any sort of a legal club.

He drove past Chouji to the gates of the underground parking, which were rising slowly. With every centimeter loud pop-pretending-to-be-rock music was freeing itself into the silent alley. Naruto had little time to give the situation a think, as he suddenly found himself down there, surrounded by girls clad in microscopic pieces of material by crucial mistake called clothes. Kiba behind him was more than enjoying himself, greeting everyone and being greeted back. And then no one was blocking his way any more and Naruto threw a look around.

Cars, loud music, people and again - cars, cars, cars. Not **so **many, but each attracting attention in its own special way. And everything - low growling of engines, fast beat emerging from nowhere and way too familiar smell of exhausts - made Naruto's heart fall right down to heels and rest there.

"This way!" Chouji waved at him, pointing to a corner where he could leave his bike.

"This is fucking awesome!" Kiba shouted right into Naruto's ear before sliding off the saddle and the other had nothing else to do rather than agree. It didn't matter the slightest bit he had told himself to never mess with 'this stuff' again,** the words** were true to the core.

"It is!" he shouted back to Kiba, grinning widely. Both Kiba and Chouji laughed at that.

"We're not actually spending much time here." Shika explained appearing behind Chouji and shoving yet another package of chips into grateful arms. "Today is a 'great' day..." his voice trailed off, drowning in noise. Kiba continued, seeing that he was too lazy to go on and Chouji - too busy with chips.

"There's this dude from Kyoto, who's said to be as great as Gaara." Naruto didn't have a slightest idea of who Gaara was, but nodded nonetheless. 'As great as' here meant a competition. "Dunno if they're gonna race..."

The talk was interrupted by loud squealing and something blonde and curvy attaching itself to Shikamaru.

"Have you seen him?" that something screeched, shaking the pony-tailed boy back and forth.

"What is this?" Naruto whispered to Kiba, backing off a little.

"This is Ino, she's Shika's childhood friend. Gods, she scares me sometimes!" was hushed reply. Chouji was trying to hide his two most prized possessions - chips and himself - behind the little Gilera and at the same time making signs for Naruto and Kiba to save the third - Shikamaru. Frantic refusing signing back attracted Ino's attention.

"Huh? Who's this sweetie?" she dropped half-conscious Shika and turned to the two. Intuition remarked to Naruto that she hardly had been talking about Kiba. Who - little deceiving bastard! - immediately pushed him forward, into Ino's waiting arms.

"This is Naruto! Have fun mutilating **him**!"

"Mutilating? Why would I do such a thing?" she laughed, looking him over. "He's delicious, but I've found someone else..." freed Naruto retreated to his roadster, thanking whatever Gods could hear him.

"Who's the poor guy?" Kiba cried out.

"Uchiha Sasuke! The Kyoto boy."

"Wo-ha! Not bad." Chouji whistled from his hiding place.

"Is he here?" Shika sat up, no more playing dead.

"Yes! And he's freaking gorgeous!"

"Are they going to race?"

"Nah, it seems like they're on good terms. Shika! I want you to introduce me to him!" she whined, big blue eyes overflowed with fake tears.

"How am I supposed to do it? I haven't even met him yet!"

"Don't be an ass!" Kiba bared teeth in a smile. "Introduce Ino-chan to Kyoto guy, Shika!" Naruto looked unbelievingly at Kiba (honestly, deceiving bastard!), as Ino once again attached herself to poor Shikamaru and tugged him away. The rest, including Naruto, followed. Halfway to the destination Ino stopped dead in her trek.

"Sakura!" she barked and pointed to a company of four, of who two were girls, one blonde and punky-looking and the other with hair dyed in bubble-gum pink, general glamourousy rivaling Ino.

"Can't **she **introduce you?" Chouji asked, willing to help his friend, who radiated desire to be somewhere else.

"No! Let's go." and she went on with determination of a nuclear submarine.

They came up to the company, Ino smiling brightly and flashing exposed skin to the guys, both of whom reminded Naruto of his groupmates - ties and other attributes of businessmen were present and made him shiver with something akin to disgust.

"…is true!" the blonde stomped foot in heavy army boot on the concrete floor. "The person who told me this was **very** reliable!"

"He could have been lied to, Temari-san." Said the other girl, who must have been Sakura, and shot a glance at the direction of black-haired boy seeking approval for her words. Instead she got a sugary squeal from Ino, who rushed to hug her.

"Sakura-chan! Long time no see!" she was smiling widely, venom leaking out of her eyes. Naruto exchanged looks with Shikamaru and shivered.

"Hi there, Gaara!" Kiba said. "What were you talking about?"

Now, Naruto identified everyone. The short redhead to his left with a hieroglyph – he couldn't see properly – tattooed in red ink on his forehead and emotionless emerald-green eyes was Gaara, supposedly the DK, Drift King (or whatever they called him in Tokyo) of the city. While the other, tall pale guy with raven-black hair and black eyes, was none other than the so much talked about 'Kyoto boy' Uchiha Sasuke. Now that he got closer, nodding to Gaara, as Shika introduced him, Naruto could see what was Ino's shrieking about – Uchiha's porcelain face, bearing no sign of emotion, was one of lifeless ideality and again he frowned a little feeling dislike crawling up his spine.

"We were talking about the Fox." Temari said. "Nether Gaara, nor Uchiha trust in her! They say she never existed. Chauvinists! I'm sure – you just can't trust that a girl can be as cool as you are." Gaara hn'ed and looked away, while Uchiha sighed and spoke wearily.

"The story of that Fox girl doesn't sound the slightest bit believable."

"What the fuck are you talking about, dudes?" Kiba blurted out. "I don't get it!"

"They're speaking about a Naha (3) legend, Kiba." Shika explained. "Naruto, you're from Okinawa, right? You can tell us your version of the story."

Eyes of their company adverted to him, making Naruto feel uneasy. He didn't feel all that happy about coming to this place and instantly decided to never do it again. 'This stuff' extended.

"Yes, why…" he began, feeling black holes of Uchiha's eyes setting is skin on fire. No, it wasn't disgust of any sort, it must have been fear. But why? He had never met him until now. "Fox was a girl from France – and **they say** it's her true name – who came to Naha three years ago to visit her grandfather, old man Sarutobi, who used to govern the streets long ago. She was only fifteen, **they say**, but she tricked everyone and entered Naha's annual government-powered street-race and won it. Then, **they say**, she joined a band and refused to go back to Paris."

"Blah-blah-blah… What's the point, Naruto?" Kiba heaved a sigh.

"Shut up, Dog-gace!" Temari spat. Naruto felt Uchiha's eyes flicker from his face somewhere else, but then the stare was back and this time supported by Gaara's interested gaze.

"And so, this band of her soon started ruling over the city." Naruto stopped. "That's all."

"What a shitty story!" Kiba exclaimed. Chouji's munching had a note of agreement in it.

"And now?" Gaara asked suddenly. Naruto's words flew out of his mouth by themselves.

"She left."

"Left? Where?"

"Home, to France."

"I heard another version of this 'legend'." Temari interrupted all upcoming questions. "Don't know anything about Fox entering a band, but I heard this girl was the best drifter of Okinawa prefecture."

Naruto shuddered.

"Maybe. In the end, this is just a legend."

"See?" Sakura jumped, satisfied. "I said it's all lies." She looked rally adorable in her joy and everyone laughed. Grinning widely, Naruto felt eyes – Gaara's and Uchiha's move away and sighed inwardly.

In his bathroom, watching his face in the mirror, Naruto traced faint whisker-like scars on his cheeks absentmindedly. Life in Tokyo wasn't going the road he supposed it to go, but he wasn't a person to go back. In the end, it was just his first University day.

Only… Never mess with 'this stuff' again. Never ever.

* * *

(1) Mercedes of SLK class are similar to Mercedes SLR McLaren, only not _that_ fast (which can be cured by some tuning) and _that _expensive. Random Merc SLK costs about one hundred thousands bucks.  
(2) Business and financial news magazine.  
And – 'company soldiers'. In a book about Japan I've read those working for large holdings, 'Panasonic', for example, are being sent from one city to another, from one job to another, like soldiers are sent from one war to another, and thus are called 'company soldiers'.  
(3) Naha is the capital of Okinawa prefecture. 

Wo-ha! It's the longest piece I've written evah! Hope you enjoy it. And sorry for the delay, again.


	3. A hunt for iron and surprises

**I understand now that with every chapter I dive deeper and deeper into minor details, which might go unnoticed by some and confuse others. If you want – just whistle – and I'll make an jl account for this fic and upload there photos of cars/bikes guys are using along with explanation of slang words.  
****And for those of you who suggested Naruto being Fox… If you read the chapter attentively, there's a hint. Though it will not lead you directly to the truth, I've got something more twisted for you, hehe…

* * *

****Chapter two. A hunt for iron and surprises

* * *

**

_So in the end, Harry Potter killed Voldemort, but lost his memory. He went back to peaceful life, studied programming in college and lived happily until one day the screen of his computer flashed: "The Martix has you, Neo."_

_Anecdote

* * *

_

It wasn't long after Naruto got to bed, as he was woken up by his mobile phone's insane ringing. Had he really thought 'crazy cow mooing' ring tone was _fun_? He grabbed the phone from the bedside drawer, knocking some books and a photo frame down in the process, and flicked it open yawning an annoyed "Hello?"

"Big Bro Naruto?" careful voice made him sit up straight, all remains of sleepiness gone flying out of the window.

"Konohomaru? What the… what the hell?"

"Oh, crap, Big Bro, sorry, sorry, sorry, I forgot about the time zones! It must be around 3 pm in Tokyo, right?"

"Just where the hell are you now?" the room was enveloped in darkness and Naruto urged to switch the lights on, but he didn't, frozen at the sound of too familiar voice.

"Switzerland, Big Bro. They sent me back here from Germany after the surgery, 'to rest'." The line went silent for a second, and Naruto's heart plopped down, but then he could hear faint noises at the other end and he released the breath he had held.

"So, the surgery went normal?"

"Yeah. The doctor says I'll be able to run by the end of the summer and I pretty much think she underestimates. Grandpa Sarutobi is positive, too. He was going to call you the other day." What was this feeling? As if Naruto had had a whole world on his shoulders and now someone took the weight away.

"God…" he whispered.

"And how are you, Big Bro?" Konohomaru sounded really enthusiastic and Naruto couldn't help but let a little smile trace his lips.

"I moved to Tokyo a week ago. And I first went to UT yesterday…" He was interrupted by rustling and hushed cursing.

"Fuck, my nurse is coming! If they find out I have a phone, I'm dead meat! Bye, Big Bro! I'll call you later!"

The line went dead. Naruto fell down on his bed, gripping the phone until he could hear the plastic of it crack. "Holy shit!" he started laughing quietly, his voice echoing due to lack of furniture. Say it – he had just met the happiest moment of his life – in overwhelming darkness of his room, with feet cold and hands sweaty, with aftertaste of alcohol in his mouth and adrenaline rushing through his veins along with relief.

* * *

Okay, Naruto had set up the stupid 'crazy cow mooing' ring tone himself, but he for sure was going to kill the person who dared to call him at five twenty one in the morning. Not just kill, but have him hanged, drawn and quartered.

"Good morning, Sunshine!" Kiba sang, not knowing that his destiny had just been set for premature death. First, it was fucking five twenty… already two pm and second of April, so the sky behind bare windows of Naruto's room was dark, bearing no signs of upcoming dawn. And second – no one, if he wanted to die happily in his own bed, surrounded by grandchildren, ever called him Sunshine.

Of which Kiba was informed immediately, along with colorful descriptions of what Naruto was going to do with him as soon as he got up.

"Fuck, man, you are a brutal creature! And you looked so innocent yesterday!" Kiba only laughed.

"What do you want?" Naruto moaned, rolling on bed to get a peek at the slit under his bedroom door, now glowing slightly – Iruka must have been up already and switched lights in the living room on.

"To invite you for a session of Gods blessed shopping!"

"Huh?"

"To the holy land of Akihabara (1)!" Naruto was all years now. "How about a hunt for some iron (2)?"

"'M always ready, but why so early!" he wailed.

"Early? Man, you're kidding! The earlier you come, the higher your chance to grab something unique! Where are you from? The mountains?" Kiba asked disbelievingly. "Now pick your ass up and meet me in half an hour at the hall of your frigging Pacific Tower."

The line went dead.

Naruto fell off the bed, legs entangled in the comforter and shouted towards the lit up rooms.

"Iruka?"

"Yeah?"

"Good morning!"

"Same to you!" he grinned at the greeting. Sure, Uzumaki family – and Iruka was part of it, no doubt! – had always been known as a bunch of crazy guys… getting up at half past five in the morning on Sunday, for example.

Even after all morning procedures Naruto's reflection wasn't any different from what it was when he had just got out of the bed. Sighing he put on black tee-shirt with bold orange "You say BITCH like it's a bad thing" to accompany black pants of his biker's costume. He looked stupidly stylish in them, but couldn't care less for what people would think, security came first.

"Why so early?" Iruka questioned Naruto, as he entered the kitchen yawning.

"Gonna meet with a friend of mine at six down at the parking." Naruto snatched a can 'Adrenaline Rush' (3) out of the refrigerator and gave a girlish squeal as he found a cup of steaming ramen waiting for him on the table. "Iruka, I love you!" without wasting any more time, of which he had only ten minutes left, Naruto attacked his ramen.

"Why are _you_ up so early?" Iruka looked weird, eyes glancing left and right for support.

"I… um… also have a meeting." He answered at least, smiling weakly and Naruto concluded that the meeting sure had something to do with a pile of keys in the glove compartment of his Subaru. And with 'this stuff'. But after the night talk with Konohomaru Naruto was calm as a tyrannosaurus, so he let it slide giving Iruka time to collect the guts for a big talk.

He quickly finished his ramen, shoved keys and wallet into pockets of matching pants black leather jacket and, after giving Iruka one final hug, left.

Down at the empty hall, to Naruto's immense surprise, he was met with not only Kiba, but Uchiha Sasuke as well, still in business suit, but looking rather... rushed, as if he had just been participating in an orgy and went out for a minute to pee.

"Hello!" Naruto waved at them, utterly confused. Yesterday evening – or rather, this very early morning, when Naruto left 'Rusty wheel' (he suspected that in fact it wasn't the name of the place, so stupidly it sounded… and way too Kiba-ish) there were no hints of close friendship among 'his guys' and Uchiha. When did they get along?

"Guess who I met just now?" Kiba hollered, his loud voice ringing through the empty hall and waking the concierge. "Sasuke lives in that blasted tower as well!" Uchiha rolled eyes, shaking Naruto's hand nonchalantly. "You guys 're lucky to live close to each other! It gets me for about an hour to get to anyone!"

"Sort of." Naruto couldn't decipher any enthusiasm on Uchiha's face as well as he didn't feel any himself.

"Bye, guys…" Uchiha waved them off, making his way to the elevator. Naruto sighed, glad he didn't have to spend any more time with him. There _was_ something about the guy that made him nervous.

"Hey, Sasuke!" Kiba suddenly called out. "Wanna go to Akihabara with us? It's gonna be fun!"

Uchiha waved his hand at them dismissively, not even bothering to turn around and speak a word.

"Moron!" Naruto growled under his breath, leaving the hall. Kiba shivered, tailing him.

"We're out of his league, dude, and thank Gods that we are!" They were now descending the stairs to the basement and Naruto stopped abruptly, staring at Kiba.

"What the hell? You just asked him to join us!"

"Don't know what's gotten into me. Tried to be polite? You should be with guys like him! Do you really think I enjoy his company? For Gods' sake, his big bro is from yakuza!" at this words Naruto almost stumbled down.

"What the hell, Kiba? Just yesterday – hence, several hours ago you didn't even know the guy's name!" Kiba stared back, blinking owlishly.

"Naruto, what kind of hole is that your Naha? One doesn't have to crack Interpol archive to get information about Uchihas! Everyone knows their wealth is built on illegal activities, - and can you believe Sasuke's studying law? Along with Gaara, holy shit!" he kept on blabbering, but Naruto was already lost in the information flow. Uchiha Sasuke simply traveled into an imaginary folder marked as 'this stuff' and was thrown out of Naruto's head.

"Forget it, let's go."

* * *

Boxes were carefully put down at the floor and Naruto, followed by Kiba's amused whistle, kicked the stereo system resting at the corner to the door, turning it on. The room was immediately filled with melodic tunes of electric guitar and husky voice of James Hetfield (4). Kiba high-fived Naruto for his music preferences.

"Want to drink anything?" Naruto asked, directing his way to the kitchen.

"Cold coffee?"

"Sure thing!" he came back in a minute, bringing along several cans of cold coffee – he had insisted to keep some in the refrigerator, standing his ground that this kind of drinks as well as junk food was a crucial part of a programmer's diet. His next point now was leading Iruka to a term 'hacker'. Unfortunately, for now his godfather's understanding of it was reduced to a common-used stereotype of someone distributing pirate programs and stealing money from foreign banks. But in some time… "So how come you guys settled for drifter's company?" Naruto asked Kiba, delivering him coffee and falling onto his bed.

"Long story… Well, in short, we – Chouji, Shika and I – were in the same class with a girl, whose cousin is in Gaara's clique. Not that we hang out at Gaara's that much, but when they drift…" Kiba's dreamy voice trailed off "that is something, dude! Hadn't I been a complete moron with engined type of technique, I'd become a drifter for sure!"

'You don't want it, trust me,' was ready to fall off his tongue, but he bit this words so they never left his mouth.

"What are we having tomorrow at UT?" he asked instead.

"Elementary shit," Kiba shrugged. "Logic, algorithms and programming languages. Shika said he was going to ditch first couple of lectures."

"Well, at least they've got comfortable chairs in the auditorium – sleeping there would be almost like in a bed!"

"You read my mind, dude!" they laughed and Kiba started saying something, but stopped mid-sentence, pointing atNaruto's jacket, lying carelessly at the floor. "Hey, your vibrator's signaling." Naruto started coughing at the 'vibrator', but seconds later he could hear faint mooing.

"Uzumaki." He breathed into the phone, having as usual forgotten to look at the id of the caller.

"Naruto, it's me." Iruka's calm voice with a faint note of panic alerted Naruto.

"Something's wrong?"

"Eh… You say so…" his godfather laughed a little bit nervously. "Ahem. I'm at a police station now. Could you please contact our lawyer? Please?"

"THE FUCK!"

"Ah… I'm at the local Roppongi police station, come soon, please?"

"Iruka, what the hell…" all response he got were angry beeps.

"Hey, dude, what's up?" Kiba's worried voice snapped Naruto back to reality.

"My godfather was arrested!" he said, staring at Kiba disbelievingly.

"What for?" Kiba stared back.

"Hell knows! Now I've gotta call out our family's lawyer. Holy shit!" he ran up to one of the laptops, resting at the far corner of the room, flicked it open and turned on.

"Stop angsting, dude. Maybe he's got into a car crash or witnessed a murder." Kiba suggested, patting Naruto's shoulder. "Just grab you credit card, documentsand go to wherever he's held." Naruto looked up.

"Crap, you're right. It's not necessarily 'this stuff' at fault." He muttered. But before he got up, he still wrote down whatever was listed in the "family lawyer" file.

"'This stuff'?" Kiba asked, following him out of the apartment, boxes, partly his, forgotten. Naruto flashed him a sad grin.

"Several years ago he was involved into a nasty business… Cars cracking, primarily. But it was when we lived in Osaka and after moving here he promised to put an end to it."

"Cars cracking?"

"Like you know – electronics, that limit speed to 250 km an hour? Two-three hours of work and you can squeeze out all 280 - or even more, hell knows, the speed above doesn't even register -without any nitro. Of course, it's illegal."

"Screw me shitless! You've got cool relatives, dude! Can _you_ do it?" he was all ears. Naruto shrugged. 'Never ever'.

"No, it's more mechanical job, rather than programming."

"Sexy." They came up to Naruto's Kawasaki and Kiba possessively grabbed one of two helmets resting on the saddle.

"So." Naruto glared at him. "Where's Roppongi' local police station?"

"Why should I know? I've never been arrested on Roppongi!" Naruto blinked.

"Does it mean you've been arrested somewhere else?"

* * *

(1) Akihabara, Akiba used to be a holy land of electronics, messy and unruly. Now you still can find a lot of useful things there, but it turns into a place for an anime-addict rather than anyone else.  
(2) Hardware.  
(3) That's an alcohol-free 'energetic' drink with a lot of caffeine, taurineand other energizing substances.  
(4) The vocalist of 'Metallica'.

Confusing chapter, am I right? But I've put some explanations of 'this stuff'! Promise, the next one will be longer!


	4. La boheme artistique, pt 1

**Yesterday I got my cellphone (Nokia 6680) snatched out of my hands. Just great. The saddest thing is that all my contacts are lost. NEVER PLAY OPENLY WITH YOUR PHONE WHILE UNDERGROUND, FOLKS! Or at least pay attention to the surroundings.  
****A/N: Now NA is as well stored on lj! And with all the notes! num-analysis(dot)livejournal(dot)com  
****Warning: computer fraud is bad, bad! Remember it.  
****Disclaimer: I don't own 'Naruto', I don't own 'Microsoft', and I don't even own a car! Jeez, what a hobo I am!

* * *

**

**Chapter three. La boheme artistique, part 1

* * *

**

_Hacker_ – _someone, who secretly uses or changes the information in other people's computer systems. (Longman dictionary of contemporary English)_

_- a person who enjoys exploring the details of programmable systems and how to stretch their capabilities, as opposed to most users, who prefer to learn only the minimum necessary. (The Jargon File)

* * *

_

"Again, excuse us for that misunderstanding, Umino-san." The policeman again bowed at them, as Naruto, Kiba and Iruka were to exit the police station. "You see, the anniversary was just two weeks ago and photos were on TV..."

"It's nothing, Hatake-san." Iruka managed to mumble, hiding his slightly shaking hands in pockets. Naruto glanced at him with pity, noticing Kiba look away with the same emotion written all over his face. Iruka wasn't any sort of a hysterical school-girl, but Saint Transistor, Naruto wouldn't brag on about his own possible behavior in the same situation.

Naruto guided Iruka out. It was chilly outside and the sky was painted dark-blue, with hints of purple on the horizon, behind the skyscrapers. Iruka's car was left somewhere else – Naruto wasn't fully aware of details of the arrest - but three of them wouldn't have seated on his little motorcycle and sending Iruka home alone while he and Kiba drove the bike wasn't an option either. In the end he decided to leave his Kawasaki near the police station where it was currently parked and take a taxi for three of them.

"Come on, cheer up!" he said to Iruka as they were seated in taxi.

"It's not every day that you are mistaken for a terrorist such as Kitamura Koichi!" Iruka groaned in defense. The driver looked at them suspiciously, ears nearly perked up at the sound of notorious name (1). Kiba sighed wearily.

"We need to get completely trashed." Iruka's eyes snapped open, as if he had just noticed Kiba's presence.

"Inuzuka Kiba." Naruto said before any questions arose. "My UT mate." Iruka and Kiba shook hands, the latter twisting himself to get a better angle as he sat on the front seat.

"So how about …?" Kiba flashed them a grin and Iruka, to Naruto's immense surprise, grinned back.

"Sure, dude."

* * *

Monday morning came as a tsunami, disastrous and unstoppable. Iruka, who had drunk more than Naruto and Kiba altogether, but sober as a fresh cucumber, woke them up, saying that life's little surprises like hangover were no reason for ditching university. And while Naruto had never been into alcohol and felt relatively okay, poor Kiba looked ready to die.

"Shouldn't have drunk that much…" he moaned, taking a cup of coffee from Iruka and looking at it with disgust. When he noticed Naruto happily devouring his usual morning ramen, he seemed up to throwing up.

"Leave the kitchen, your unhealthy face eats away my appetite," Naruto ordered him, sparing a second between two mighty gulps of noodles.

"Gods, watching you eat eats away _my_ appetite," Kiba muttered but left the kitchen nonetheless.

After half an hour more of morning bickering, promises of eternal friendship between Iruka and Kiba (Naruto wondered for thousand's time how could his godfather be this infant in his thirty three; but that was one of the reasons he loved him so much) and simple waiting for the taxi to appear, they were on their way to Hongo. The taxi wasn't allowed into campus, so they had to walk all way to 8th Engineering Building by themselves. To Naruto, who hadn't taken a walk for an unidentified (but big enough) period of time, this fifteen-minute walk was a complete torture and Kiba had his own morning fun watching Naruto complain about hurting legs – though his mood didn't rise much as his head hurt really bad every time he tried to laugh.

In the auditorium their first lecture – something about the history of computing instead of promised by logic - was to take place, they found no familiar face; both Chouji and Shika were absent. Kiba had told that Shika was going to ditch first couple of lectures and no wonder that Chouji, his best friend, didn't want to spend them in company of two annoying loudmouths. But to speak honestly, the lecture wasn't as bad as it could have been – in the end UT wasn't the best Japan's University for nothing, but serious faces of Naruto's zombie-like 'mates' depressed him endlessly and he during Logic he did fell asleep, safely hidden from Professor's wrath behind zombies' broad backs.

Afterwards, when Shika and Chouji did show up, four of them decided to skip Algorithms and go to a nearby café, as Kiba's organism came to life finally and reminded its owner that he hadn't bothered to have breakfast. Kiba didn't' have to put much effort into persuading – what new could they learn anyway? (2)

Surprisingly, there they found some familiar faces – two girls from the night Naruto was taken to Gaara's, blonde Ino and pink-haired Sakura, were sitting at the window chatting. They didn't mind their company; moreover Ino was really happy to see Shikamaru.

"But what are you girls doing here?" Chouji asked when everyone was seated. "Komaba Campus isn't that close."

"Komaba? What are you studying, ladies?" Naruto interrupted any upcoming answer.

"Japanese Culture," Sakura smiled at him sweetly, blushing slightly at Kiba's whistling. Then they were interrupted by waitress taking their orders and Chouji repeated his previous question.

"Well, we weren't looking for you, if that's what you're implying," Ino smirked. "As I've said, I've got a more interesting prey – Uchiha Sasuke." Naruto felt a tingle of irritation inside his chest at the mentioning of this name. "Our sources say that he'll come here in…" she glanced at her watch, "forty three minutes."

"Want to ask him out or what?" Kiba asked, stealing a chocolate cookie from Ino's plate.

"Yes," Sakura answered instead, scolding her features and slapping Naruto's hand away from her own plate. Naruto grunted, but waited until the waitress brought his order – green tea and cheesecake.

"What? Both of you? Or you, Ino, found your interest in Gaara?" Chouji sneered. Shika, who had been silent during the whole talk, nearly choked on his green tea. Naruto remembered gloomy redhead and shivered – the guy was creepy and he couldn't imagine what kind of braveness a girl would have to possess to ask him out.

"Haha, Chouji, very funny," Ino and Sakura simultaneously rolled eyes. "We will come up to him and ask which of us he would date."

"Don't you think you're too fast? You met him just a day ago…" Naruto noticed, taking a sip of his tea and putting the cup away right then, as it had jasmine in and he hated even mentioning of the flower.

"Hey, we spent all Sunday together!" and on they went, babbling about amazing day they had spent with Gaara, his sister Temari (Naruto remembered the punk blonde) and – gasp! – Sasuke. And then, when they finished talking, Kiba had to open his mouth and verbalize the worst.

"Hey, you know, the Kyoto boy actually lives in the same building as Naruto!"

Two pairs of eyes full of determination adverted to him.

"Naruto, sweetie," Sakura sang in a sugary voice and Naruto quickly reconsidered his opinion of her as of a nice girl, as she leaned closer, "Might you as well know his apartment? And phone number?"

"W-why would I?" he answered leaning back in his chair. "He's not of my friends or something… We just met him the other day in the lobby."

"But…" it was Ino this time who looked the four of them over, leering predatory. "You guys like to call yourselves 'hackers'. Why wouldn't you..?"

"Hey!" Kiba, Chouji and Naruto exclaimed almost at the same time, while Shikamaru only rolled eyes at their exasperation, as if he was only passing by and had nothing to do with them. "Hacking is not about this! You can equal hacking to programming, not to computer fraud!"

"Whatever." Sakura sighed. "What I'm saying is that you can get his phone number, right? Or you chicken out?"

"No way," Naruto shook head. "What's the point? What do we get out of it?"

"Oh, so you want us to pay…" Sakura exchanged glances with Ino and turned to Kiba. "This Friday Sasuke and Gaara are going to have a little competition. Unofficial; only the closest friends are invited…" she paused, registering hungry look in Kiba's eyes (Naruto remembered how enthusiastically he spoke about drifting and groaned, 'He's trapped!') and then continued satisfactorily. "Want to be one of those 'closest', Kiba? I can help."

"Trapped." Shikamaru muttered under his breath and Chouji nodded. To Naruto's dread Kiba turned to him.

"I'm not giving you access to my laptop!" he blurted out even before the other spoke. Ino and Sakura fell silent. They couldn't have known what Kiba and Naruto thought about, but it was obvious to any dumbass that since Naruto said 'no' to Kiba unverbalized claim, Kiba needed a 'yes'. And unfortunately, neither of the girls knew Naruto enough to lure him into a trap like Kiba. Neither of the girls, but…

"Naruto…" Kiba spoke slowly. "I bet you can't write a program that would crack your concierge's computer in PDS (3)." Chouji and Shikamaru started laughing.

"Oh, really?" Naruto's eyes turned into two tiny slits, while he grinned widely. "Want to check who'd write it faster?"

"Yes, I want. What does the winner get?"

Naruto's grin grew even wider and he proposed without even thinking.

"A wonderful sight of the looser stripping at the party after Friday drift."

"Set!" Kiba jumped from his chair and pointed at Naruto. "Shika, Chouji – you watch as I beat this lamer's ass!"

"You watch as _I_ beat this lamer's ass." Naruto mimicked his words, satisfied look on his face. Sakura and Ino groaned.

"Stop comparing length of your dicks, you idiots," Sakura grunted out, annoyed, and stood up to make her way towards WC, paying no attention to Naruto, who was watching her with mouth wide open. Was it the same sweet girl of several minutes ago!

"They're coming!" Ino gasped suddenly and pointed to the window, where black Mercedes SLK, the one Naruto had fell in love with, parked and revealed Sasuke and Gaara. "Do I look sexy?"

* * *

"Okay, I'll explain, just stop shouting, you hurt my ears!"

"Your stupid music hurts ears!"

"This is 'Metallica', you uneducated..!" Naruto hugged his stereo-system protectively, which only made Ino and Sakura laugh.

Both girls were now sitting on his bed as it was the only piece of furniture in the room – if you don't count bedside drawer and numerous bookshelves. Naruto's three laptops and computer rested on the floor between pillows and cans of beer… remains of Sunday little party which resulted in Naruto, Kiba and Iruka playing 'Warcraft III'… but hey, what else did you expect from computer-obsessed freaks?

Iruka was out somewhere and Kiba, Shika and Chouji were supposed to come any minute with all the necessary equipment – like cold coffee and chips Naruto had run of. And before they came, Naruto tried to explain the girls what were they going to do.

"Pacific Tower has anything in it – a swimming pool, a gym… phone and Internet connection are provided as well. Thus if you use that connection, your computer gets included into a local web." While speaking, he flicked open one of the laptops, the one with Windows installed. The girls watched him awe equal to one their kind paid to drifters and Naruto felt something, some emotion tug at his heart slightly. "Concierge's comp has all the info about those who live in the building." Naruto turned to the girls, now that everything (as if he needed any preparations) was ready and he went on. "But, obviously we don't have access into his machine, as well as no one has access into mine – and no, Sakura, Sasuke's not included into the web, there are only seven or eight comps in it other than mine and concierge's and I checked every one of them. So you see – we need a password." He moved left to give girls a peek at the screen. A window was open, asking for a password to enter into computer of user 001 ("Very imaginative", Naruto remarked.). "Now Kiba comes and we watch how I kick his ass writing the simplest of programs in PDS."

Just as he finished talking, they heard the doorbell ringing and Naruto rushed to let his friends in. In ten minutes everyone was seated comfortably on the pillows in Naruto's room – Chouji munching chips nonchalantly, Ino and Sakura listening to Shikamaru play Iruka's acoustic guitar and sing something quietly, while Naruto and Kiba were madly typing. And the first to finish was…

"Done!" Naruto exclaimed a mere second before Kiba. "You strip, lamer." The blond started laughing maniacally watching his friend turn red.

"Y-you just check! I bet your program won't even work!" he managed to squeak to everyone's amusement.

"You wish!" a couple of clicks and Naruto turned back to his guest. "What? It's not an immediate thing, folks, it may take up to… I don't know – forty minutes? Want to have tea?"

In the kitchen Naruto served everyone tea and ginger cookies. Leaning on the counter he mused silently why girls were so desperate to get Uchiha's attention. For all he knew about people, one wouldn't want to associate himself with a person like him. One the other hand – Ino and Sakura were already into drifting. That couldn't help one maintain his guts about right and wrong… He didn't even finish this thought as his cellphone rang.

"Hello?"

"Naruto?" old man's voice sounded distant.

"Grandpa Sarutobi! Jesus! How are you?" Konohomaru had told Naruto he'd call, but still the call was a pleasant surprise.

"Oh, everything is fine with both Konohomaru and me. We…" Naruto couldn't hear anything for several seconds – "Japan soon."

"You're going back?"

"Yes. I will call you when…" again the line went silent and then Naruto was awarded with screeching beeps. He cursed and looked up. Everyone was talking and no one seemed to pay attention to sudden call. No one, except for…

"Hey, Naruto," Ino asked, looking at him intensely. "Remember the 'legend' you told us the other day?"

Naruto blinked and nodded. Of course he did! But why did she bring up the topic?

"You told us Fox was a granddaughter of 'old Sarutobi' or something like that?" Naruto nodded again. Whatever the rest had been discussing, was forgotten now as they listened to Ino questioning him. "Does that person have anything to do with 'Grandpa Sarutobi', which called you just now?"

They were watching him now and Naruto felt goosebumps crawl up his spine. There was no escape for him, he had to think something up and fast!

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

'Thank you, God!' Naruto almost fell to his knees as Ino and Sakura, having completely forgotten about the ordeal, rushed to his room.

"It worked, Kiba," Naruto smirked at his friend. "You have to put up with your shyness." While speaking he quickly searched the hard disk of concierge's computer. "Here it is. Now, which floor, do you think, he lives on? Expensive apartments are from sixteenth and up."

"Of course he's living in an expensive one!" Sakura nudged him.

"Let's see. 16, 17, 18, 19, 20… Okay… Hmmm… Oh, look, here he is – apartment #154, contact phone number… Hey, Ino, Sakura, what are you waiting for? I can't extract Uchiha out of this file anyway, so write down!" Before they did so, both girls awarded Naruto with a hug and a kiss. Naruto would have felt completely happy hadn't Shikamaru been glaring at him. It was obvious he hadn't forgotten about Fox and Ino's question.

* * *

"Oh, Jesus Christ, I can't watch it anymore!" Naruto slumped down the chair, clutching his middle and laughing madly. Let and right to him were Shikamaru and Chouji in the same positions. Because – see Kiba strip was really more than a man's organism could bear. Girls were cheering him and in response to their cheer he was dancing in a 'seductive' way, but from Naruto it emitted only one reaction – laugh. Not too far from their table (they were in a bar, it was Friday night and the competition between Gaara and Sasuke hadn't taken place, as both were a little drunk and could only swear faith towards each other and nothing more) Ino and Sakura were assaulting Sasuke and – Jesus – this view was almost as hilarious as the one in front of Naruto. Pathetic look on Sasuke's face spoke of all he had had to bear – calls in night, endless flow of SMS's… and if he could – and had – change his phone number, he couldn't move to another place as easily. So he had a bonus of love letters, flowers in the morning, afternoon and evening and proposal after proposal of dating and marriage. Naruto suspected that if he had known whose fault it was, Sasuke would undoubtedly castrate him. "No, I can't watch it any more." He got up darted towards WC, two cocktails he had drunk asking to come out.

He spent several minutes in the bathroom and when he came out, Kiba was already finished and was making out in a dark corner with a girl. Laughing quietly at his friend, Naruto decided to have a better angle at poor Uchiha's face – he didn't like the guy, why should he have felt any pity? – so he went straight to the table where he was seated, Ino and Sakura clinging to him as if he was a life jacket and they were drowning.

When he got closer, he saw that both girls were drunk and Uchiha didn't have the guts to push them off – well, good for him; so he was talking with Gaara, paying no attention to their repetitive squeals of "Sasuke-kun, you are hot!" or "Sasuke-kun, marry me!".

"Naruto, friend! Sit with us!" Ino shouted right into Sasuke's ear. Uchiha winced at that and looked up to see Naruto asking for his permission to seat. Grateful that at his sight Sakura abandoned him and attached herself to the blond, he nodded.

"Uzumaki Naruto." They had been introduced to each other, but it was always hard to remember name of a person you'd met only once and talked to briefly, so he had never minded naming himself again.

"Uchiha Sasuke." The other nodded, turning back to Gaara, who didn't even bother looking at Naruto. The girls, however, were really happy to see him.

"How was you week, Naruto?" Sakura asked. "Say hello to Iruka, man was he hot!" Iruka came early that day and got to know Naruto's new friends.

"Sasuke-kun is hotter, right, Sasuke-kun?" Ino, who hadn't let go of Sasuke, poked him. Uchiha turned around, annoyed.

"What?"

"Sasuke-kun, did you know, that Naruto is a hacker? Hey, Naruto, did you hack anything else this week, huh?"

Whoever was this Uchiha, he wasn't stupid, even if he was drunk – and he wasn't _that_ drunk, anyway. Naruto understood it straight away, as he _heard_ something click in his head.

'Oh, shit!'

* * *

(1) Kitamura Koichi was a member of Aum Shinrikyo, a sect that on March 20, 1995 made a sarin attack on Tokyo underground. Kitamura was the getaway driver of Hayashi Ikuo (one of five men who spread sarin, a poisonous gas) and is, _according to my info_ (which can be faulty) still not found. For more information look out Haruki Murakami's book "Andaguraundo" ("Underground") or search the web.  
(2) Basically, Algorithms teach you to break any process into a line of actions – so you could write programs later on. Like "How to put a hippopotamus into refrigerator in three actions?" – "Open refrigerator, put hippopotamus in, close refrigerator." If you once were taught Algorithms, you won't need a repetition of this course ever – if you're not a complete moron.  
(3) 'PDS' is short for 'Microsoft Basic Professional Development System', for it you need to know 'Basic' programming language. Kiba is implying that Naruto's complete moron. Because – don't know if it's the same in Japan, but we were taught it in school at the age of 13. 


	5. La boheme artistique, pt 2

**Now I have a beta-reader, amazing Adela Nightmoon, who helped me with this chapter. You can see the significant change in grammar. Isn't it great? (and ff starts to annoy me. I need 'equal' sign!)  
Disclaimer: disclaimer **

**----**

_"How was you week, Naruto?" Sakura asked. "Say hello to Iruka, man was he hot!" Iruka came early that day and got to know Naruto's new friends. _

_"Sasuke-kun is hotter, right, Sasuke-kun?" Ino, who hadn't let go of Sasuke, poked him. Uchiha turned around, annoyed._

_"What?"_

_"Sasuke-kun, did you know that Naruto is a hacker? Hey, Naruto, did you hack anything else this week, huh?" _

_Whoever was this Uchiha, he wasn't stupid, even if he was drunk – and he wasn't that drunk, anyway. Naruto understood it straight away, as he heard something _click_ in his head._

_'Oh, shit!'_

**----**

**Chapter four. La boheme artistique, part two **

_If life fucks you it means you're still alive._

_Aphorism _

_----_

'I'm not running,' Naruto explained himself. 'I'm retreating to my position to think over the tactics.'

Because whatever Uchiha thought after Ino's – thank you, dear! – comment, when Naruto sheepishly scratched the back of his head, wiggling away, all his suspicions were proved right. He stood up hastily and grabbed the front of the blond's tee-shirt (red with commandante Che's black portrait), pulling him up and close.

"Let's get out!"

'Jesus bloody Christ! He's going to eat me alive!' Naruto thought, sending telepathic waves towards Kiba and Shika who were with Chouji – but neither of them noticed their friend being yanked out of the club, a misunderstanding Sakura still dangling on his hand. And crying out for help was NOT something a man asked to 'get out' would do unless he was a complete piece of shit – and thank you, Naruto thought himself a bit higher than that.

"Get your hands off me, bastard!" he growled, slapping Sasuke's hands away as soon as they stumbled out of the club into the wet, chilly night. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"What the hell is – what the hell is wrong with me!" he stepped closer to Naruto, towering over him, a faint smell of alcohol and something else familiar but indefinite, violating the blond's personal space. "It was you, I'm sure of it! It was fucking well you!"

Inwardly Naruto was laughing his ass off at Sasuke's pissed off face – after that freak dared to tug him out of the club's warmth, whatever humane pity that was left for the other quickly disappeared without a trace. Naruto for the time being, tossed away the idea of putting his address in a magazine under the title "Sexual Service" or something of the sort.

"What are you talking about?" he shouted back, playing innocent. Ino and Sakura were trying to understand what was going on, but it seemed to be too complicated for their intoxicated minds: Gaara, who for some reason followed them out, was leaning against a wall – a wet, dirty wall, hadn't he ever heard of hygiene? – watching the two interact with something akin to amusement.

"You fucking know what I'm talking about!" Uchiha was nearly shouting now and Naruto felt a giggle crawling its way out of him again. The bastard seemed to have been an icicle, but appeared to be rather hot… in terms of temper, of course.

"Jeez, go have a shower, man and then visit a psychiatrist, because you are insane." Naruto turned around, clearly stating his intention to leave only to find Gaara standing in his way. 'Now, what does _he_ want from me?' He glared at the redhead, finally deciphering the tattoo on his forehead – it was 'love'.

"Sasuke isn't finished yet." He said calmly.

"Oh, yeah? _I_ am." At that moment Uchiha grabbed his shoulder, turning him around forcefully and leaning close again.

"You owe me, you…"

"Oh, really?" Naruto made an unbelieving face. "Now try and make me pay what I owe you. Maybe you're going to call the police? Or something like that?" he laughed, pushing the other away. It wasn't in his best interests to mock Sasuke, but what little alcohol he had drunk (only two cocktails!), did have an effect upon him. "Go to hell, I don't know anything."

But then there was Gaara, cold and emotionless as ever.

"Race."

"What?" Naruto, really annoyed at that moment, glared at him.

"Let the race show who is right." Well, what other advice could one expect from an obsessed drifter? Naruto sighed, finally wrenching out of Uchiha's grasp.

"I'm not driving," he waved dismissively in the direction somewhere in between Sasuke and Gaara and marched to the door. On the threshold he stopped and looked back. "My friend's cousin's father was sent to the nuthouse half a year ago. I can ask him and he'd advise you on a good specialist in paranoia. No? As you wish…" with those parting words Naruto entered the staff room and closed the door behind himself. In less than a minute he was granted with sound of a fist connecting with brick wall, Gaara's laugh and a loud "Fuck you!"

----

Tokyo was mesmerizing. Naruto may have hated it to the core, hated it's polluted air and traffic, hated the cables and crowds, hated everything that defined it as a megapolis, but gave in to its alluring, poisonous, charms nonetheless. He could never feel as a particle, a cell of the city, he felt like a foreigner and sometimes the characters didn't make any sense, as if he had forgotten his _native_ language all of a sudden; but observing the city silently he could only be in awe. It felt strange, it was confusing and disturbing… and still he found some sort of masochistic pleasure in it. Like now, driving nearly 150 kilometers per hour on an empty highway, lights blurred into a tunnel.

A week, exactly a week ago he had sworn to 'never mess with this stuff', sworn for how long? And he had agreed with himself not to go to Gaara's… but went with the flow nonetheless, submitted to desire to see Uchiha's reaction to his little anonymous gift of two obsessed girls. And, Jesus Christ, it was almost worth what followed. And what followed? - _"Let the race show who is right." -_ That's what.

Naruto hit the brakes of his motorcycle, slowing down painfully and harshly, the long black trail behind indicating his stop. He was breathing hard and cursing under his breath in Swedish – the only fruition of the lessons with his grandfather, when the old geezer was still alive that was. Could his abrupt leave without even a 'goodbye' be considered running away? Was he a coward? Or did he simply obey what he had promised to himself?

For him it didn't matter, actually, because either way he felt like shit.

The only thing he could do was drive, breaking all speed-limits, drive until sorrow, attracted and invited by two cocktails, left him for good and little voice in his head, whispering seductively 'You could have taken the bait, you know? Could have shown them all who's the daddy out here…' shut up.

----

The next day Naruto woke up around noon, with a heavy head and the usual regrets about wasting time on being sappy and weepy. The mirror scowled back at him with the reflection of a messy insomniac and a shower couldn't help improve it.

The answering machine had a message from Shikamaru; he was wondering whether Naruto was okay. It seemed that a drunken Ino worried the guys a hell of a lot, blabbering something about an angry Sasuke who had 'guessed everything'. Naruto decided to call back after breakfast and ask him about Kiba, whom he had left in the club despite the promise to drive home.

In the kitchen he was greeted with nothing but a note glued to the refrigerator "Lunch is in the microwave oven and don't you dare eat instant ramen! -Iruka". Naruto shivered at mental image of Iruka by smell finding out he hadn't complied and killing him brutally… He fished a can of 'Adrenaline Rush' out of the fridge and went out onto the balcony, trying not to pay attention to the chilly wind.

It was such a strange sight in the morning – a forest of skyscrapers instead of a little garden. Having been sentenced to living in the dormitory of a private school and released sometimes to the 'wild' – Naha, a city of less than one hundred and fifty thousand citizens, wasn't an experience, helping to get used to 'big city life'.

Naruto's gaze adverted down by itself. Three stories below he saw a black-haired head poking out of calamity of the balcony, arms resting on the rails much like his own, only his held a can of drink, while his neighbour's – a cigarette. He couldn't help but wonder whether this was Uchiha – well, he did live on the nineteenth floor… and indeed had raven-black hair. On the other hand – nearly _everyone _had black hair and this was not a helpful indicator. Not that he wanted to communicate with Uchiha again – the guy needed a doctor and as soon as possible, but it was sort of funny – living in the same building with someone you could - exaggerating a bit, but still - name your enemy.

Trying to get a better angle of view, Naruto bent over the railings, twisting his neck. And then something horrible happened. He had completely forgotten about the freaking drink, which, no longer held tightly, easily slipped out of his hand and went down – directed straight for (possibly) Uchiha's head. An almost full can of a drink was to hit him hard and Naruto couldn't even bring himself to shout "WATCH OUT!"

'_P-mg_, which means he'll get bashed by…' he could only think dully, not finishing the calculations before the head retreated back for a second, the can swashing past, down to mother-Earth. (1)

The next second the head emerged once again, now looking up – and indeed, this was Uchiha Sasuke. A very angry one.

"What the fuck..?.! Holy shit, it's you!"

Naruto felt his hands shaking – God, he could have _killed_ him! - and whispered softly "I'm sorry… I didn't mean to…". Uchiha, of course, didn't hear. Naruto stumbled backwards, closing the balcony door shut behind himself.

In less than a minute he heard the doorbell ring. When he opened the door, his suspicions were proved right – Uchiha was standing there, cigarillo (2) between his lips, loose black t-shirt and sweatpants and, most noticeably, very angry face.

"What the fuck is your problem?" he all but hollered.

"I didn't do it on purpose!" Naruto stepped back automatically, giving Sasuke space to advance into the apartment, poking him in the chest and shouting.

"It's _you_, who needs a psychiatrist! What are you… are you stalking me?"

"ME?.! Speak about doctors! And… and fucking stop dropping ash onto the carpet!" With these words Naruto snatched the little cigar from him and threw it out of the still open door.

Uchiha blinked. Naruto glared.

"Look… I didn't do it on purpose, honestly. And it wasn't me who gave the girls your address!"

Uchiha looked at him and sighed warningly.

"If it's you, I promise, I'll kill you. Do you have any idea how annoying they are?" Naruto scratched the back of his head sheepishly, muttering under his breath "They're pretty sweet girls, aren't they?"

"I don't like girls," Uchiha snapped, turning around and leaving, at the same time fishing a pack of cigarillos out of his pocket.

"Bye…" Naruto waved at his back, feeling a little guilty about the whole ordeal. Well, not about the girls – even if Sasuke was gay… Oh, crap, did he just say he was gay? No, Naruto wouldn't want to be one to bring the news to Sakura and Ino, let them discover that themselves. So, he didn't feel the slightest bit guilty about it; whatever Uchiha had got served him right for being such a bastard. But he did feel a bit guilty for his own carelessness. What if it wasn't him three stories below, but some random poor grandpa, who would have been dashed by the freaking can? Well, maybe it would have been better if Uchiha had taken the impact on himself…

Naruto sighed wearily, and up to go to the kitchen, disregarding Iruka's order ,and went to eat some instant ramen, of course! Well, 'normal' food would be okay as well, but nothing could calm his nerves as a cup of good ol' Doshirak (3)! Halfway to the kitchen he got struck by a thought and rushed back sniffing around the hall. He even went out of the apartment, found the cigarette butt and sniffed it. No doubt, Uchiha bastard smoked the cigarillos Naruto's dad had been smoking. 'Captain Black', sweet cherry. Oh, crap, why did it have to be like this? Anyone can have their own kinks, call it Electra complex or the Oedipus one (4), but why couldn't a sweet nice girl like Sakura smoke them? Or even a nice boy (Naruto had no prejudice about sexuality)? Why did it have to be Uchiha bastard?.!

Mourning over this fact and burying the little dream of his (how was he supposed to think about 'Captain Black' the same way?), Naruto ate not one, but three cups of ramen.

----

You may (and may not) have noticed that whenever Naruto mentions divine powers, it's always 'God' and 'Jesus', while to others it's 'Gods'. Naruto's ancestors were not Japanese, so he's Christian.  
(1) _P-mg_, a formula that helps count how much would an object weight while falling. P- weight, m-mass, g-acceleration of free fall (9.78)  
(2) Also called 'little cigars'. They are the size of a cigarette, but look like cigars – dark-brown and such.  
(3) Korean instant ramen, made by 'Koya Inc'. And trust me, they **_are_** good (especially chicken ramen!).  
(4) Electra complex – when a girl (usually little) loves her father really much and starts to see everyone (even her own mother) as an obstacle on the way to her happiness with dad. It usually results in a grown-up girl comparing all partners to her dead.  
Oedipus complex – practically the same, but with boy-to-mother love.


	6. La femme fatale

**Edit: Betaed version.  
Disclaimer: whatever **

**---- **

**Chapter five. La femme fatale**

"_I've got a secret,  
My precious secret.  
But can I trust you?  
But can I trust you? "_

_Angela Christian, "The Woman in White" musical_

_---- _

Naruto sighed heavily as he slumped down his chair in utterly overwhelming boredom. He had done his homework on Logic, the most boring of all boring subjects, in advance, as they didn't have any seminars yet and no actual assignments. Prior to doing it he had finished reading Dan Simmons' _'The Rise of Endymion'_ and watched Akira Kurosawa's _'The Bad Sleep Well'_ on TV and even – oh, an accomplishment! - cleaned his room.

He was bored. Midnight was up and coming, but Naruto wasn't sleepy at all. Shikamaru and Chouji had gone with their parents on a joint trip for the whole weekend to Fuji; Kiba had found a puppy in his own courtyard, and spent the day taking care of the little creature and was tired as hell; Sakura and Ino were busy with some project and even Iruka had called to inform he'd be very, very, very late. This left Naruto with no one to hang out. Moreover, Naruto's not so numerous Internet buddies had all gone to San-Antonio to either participate in, or cheer for, 30th ACM International Collegiate Programming Contest… which left Naruto sitting in front of the monitor, dumbly staring at it.

"Just great!" he grumbled under his breath tiredly. "Maybe I'm to call Uchiha?" he shivered at the suggestion – no, thank you, he wasn't that desperate!

He didn't want to play. He didn't want to read. He didn't want to watch TV. He just wanted to talk to someone, better yet, hang out in a club but chatting via ICQ or MSN would suit just fine as well… if only anyone from his contact list were online.

Glancing once at the dark starless sky behind his room's bare window, Naruto left his room for the kitchen with a sigh. He didn't bother turning the lights on - being alone in the dark empty apartment was a little bit creepy, reminding him of childhood fears, when he ran down the dark corridor to the bathroom, afraid of imaginary monsters behind his back. But lighting up every room on his way was pathetic, as if he submitted to those fears, admitting that he was not only lonely, but also afraid. With only dim green glimmering of electronic clocks on the oven, he silently drank warm green tea - leftovers of his supper - and stumped back to his room, on the afterthought turning the lights off there as well.

But silence was another matter altogether and quiet noise of coolers was only a desperate note in its ringing in ears music.

Naruto was wide awake and no pills would have been able to cure it.

He rummaged the floor around the laptop, the screen lighting only the keyboard, until his fingers found the headphones.

What could have been more pathetic than sitting alone in darkness and listening to the bitter tunes of Apocalyptica?

Not being able to bear this strange state of mind, slowly whirling into depression, he, on an ignorant whim suddenly decided to coo over a small piece of affection from his past life, the one he never dared to erase, even while beginning to live anew.

Not giving himself time to re-think, he quickly entered _mail.yahoo.fr _and logged in as _sarutobi87_.

He never intended to do anything - only reread some letters that never ceased to amuse him and see photos he never bothered to save on hdd. But there, waiting loyally for him, was a little, five-days-old surprise. "**Vous avez 2 messages**". He stared at the link to the inbox, not daring to click it. Only three people other than him knew about this address. One was in Germany, on rehabilitation after the surgery, two others were separately sent to far regions of Japan to closed private schools with instructions to the principals to never give them access to any vehicles or an Internet. And he... he changed his phone number and lost himself among the millions of inhabitants of the capital.

"**Naruto, call me immediately no matter what time and day!**" right above four-months-old "**Photos from yesterday!**" from the same sender, Moegi-chan. Last time he'd seen her was almost two months ago, in Naha airport, when rented by grandpa Sarutobi plane was taking paralyzed Konohomaru to Switzerland.

Naruto felt his breath hitch at the sight of figures outlined in Times New Roman, size 12 and rushed to his bag in darkness, tripping over the cable, connecting his laptop to the printer but paying no attention to it. He flicked the phone open and dialed the number he had seen in the e-mail mindlessly, not giving himself time to think. She answered after the third beep, voice sleepy.

"Hello?"

"Moegi-chan!"

"Naruto! Oh, God, you _did_ call, I knew you would!" Naruto heard her sob, but she didn't stop talking. "Sarutobi-san called me the other day; he said Konohomaru was okay…"

"Yeah…" somewhat relieved Naruto crawled onto his bed and sunk into the mattress. "He called me too, said they'd return to Japan soon."

"I'm so glad he's okay," Naruto now could hear her weep.

"So am I… How are _you_, Moegi-chan?"

"I'm okay. They are going to send me abroad after summer break, but I don't want to..!"

"Come on, it's not that bad, you'll see foreign countries, get to know new people…" he spoke smoothly, knowing exactly what to say to calm the girl down. He had known her for ages after all, she was like a little sister to him.

"I suppose… Naru-oh, Gods, I wanted to tell you!" she gasped loudly, calling herself names and cursing. Naruto plopped himself on elbows, bad suspicions rushing to his mind.

"Moegi-chan?"

"Naruto, they say there's someone called Fox, and she won a street-racing contest in Osaka, and – she's going to Tokyo for some all-Japan race!" Naruto held his breath, as she continued, not pausing to even inhale. "Naruto, it's _them_! They want you to show yourself, I know it! What are we to do? What if they find you?"

"Moegi-chan – calm down. There's nothing to worry about," he didn't feel as confident as he sounded, but there was no time to hesitate. "First, it may be just a coincidence – like, Fox is a common nickname, we hadn't patented it, you know?"

"Naruto, stop playing dumb! It's _them_!"

"…and even if it's true, there's still nothing to worry about. Tokyo isn't Naha, Moegi-chan; Naha's worries are nothing in the capital. How, do you think is it possible to find a person here?"

"You haven't undergone a plastic surgery or even changed you name!"

"…millions of citizens, Moegi-chan, millions. Trust me, there's nothing to worry about. Everything will be fine, just fine. Calm down." He sighed wearily, posing as a wise old man. On the other end of the line she was sobbing, but no objections came. She – all of them; Konohomaru and Udon as well, - trusted him, their faith was unshakable and Naruto, although feeling a little guilty, used that faith to it's full extent. "I'll be fine. You'll be fine. When you go abroad, I'll visit you there, I promise. And Udon too. Have you heard from him?"

"N-no."

"Don't worry. Now tell me, how's the school? Found any friends?" his calm, self-assured voice sounded foreign to Naruto as if it wasn't him who was speaking.

"It's boring here, Naruto. I miss you – and Konohomaru, and Udon. And I miss our Kyuubi. Where is it now, Naruto? You didn't let them destroy it, did you?"

"I hid it, Moegi-chan," he lied, remembering clearly how grandpa Sarutobi showed the police to the garage, where crumpled in an awful crash was their pride, Kyuubi.

"Will you fix it, Naruto?" she was crying now and he too felt a lump in his throat.

"Of course, Moegi-chan, I will."

"Promise?"

"Promise." Of course, he was lying. But at the moment he almost believed he was going to fix the car - the one which had been torn down already.

"I'll call you. 'Night."

"'Night, Moegi-chan."

He fell back down on the bed, listening as music fell out of the earphones as water droplets fall from the sky.

'I'll think about it tomorrow.'

----

Naruto woke up with a groan, his neck aching due to the uncomfortable position he fell asleep in. He rolled off the bed and checked the clock. Five-forty-seven in the morning and he wasn't sleepy the slightest bit. He didn't feel rested either, more like restless. Whatever had gotten into him, he couldn't sleep any more.

Naruto checked Iruka's room to find him in bed, snoring happily and went to kitchen to put water to boil before starting usual morning procedures. Rubbing eyes he threw the door to the bathroom open to come face to face with an unfamiliar man, clad in nothing, but red-hearted boxers.

"Kyaaa!" Naruto squeaked, punching the man immediately.

"Fuck!" the stranger managed to blurt out, stumbling back, before Naruto, who didn't waste any time and grabbed the nearest thing – which happened to be a mop – introduced him to the ancient Uzumaki Style Of Getting Rid Of Burglars.

----

"Iruka! Wake up and call the police!" Naruto shook his godfather's shoulder.

"Mmm? Naruto?" Iruka cracked one eye open

"Wake up, call the police!"

"The police? What had happened?" Iruka jumped up.

"There's a burglar in the bathroom! Don't worry, he's unconscious and I tied him up, but hurry, I want him be behind the bars soon!" Sure, he didn't think that man could harm them in any way – he was tied, for God's sake, but the late talk with Moegi-chan and darn insomnia played on his nerves.

"Bu-burglar? Oh, Gods, Kakashi!" Iruka ran past Naruto to the bathroom, where the said gagged burglar – grey-haired weirdo with a scar running down the left part of his face from forehead to the cheek – was tied to the toilet bowl. At the sight, Iruka gasped and clutched is heart. "Naruto, what have you done!"

"Huh?"

"It's my friend, you, dumbass! And he's a police officer! Set him free, immediately!" seeing his beloved fluffy godfather tense up, Naruto paled and reached out for scissors, noticing that the red-hearted boxers of the supposed burglar were his very own. He blinked and turned to Iruka.

"Why's he wearing my underwear?" Under his confused look, Iruka started blushing, red coloring his face with unbelievable speed.

"It's just that Kakashi's clothes were wet… and I let him borrow yours…" As Naruto didn't have any drawers or a closet in his room, all his clothes (except for those lying on stereo-system and a pile of books) were stored in Iruka's room. But still.

"That's mean…" Naruto pouted. "And unhygienic!" Iruka's face started heating up, but not in a good way this time.

"Set him free already!"

----

Kakashi was fun. It was exactly him, 'officer Hatake' from the time Naruto and Kiba rescued Iruka from police station the week before. His wet clothes were drying on the balcony – along with dripping wet book of porn.

"So you say he was arrested again, you helped him out, both of you went to a bar, got trashed, swam in a fountain by the Russian Embassy, came home and Iruka gave you my boxers?" Naruto asked, with impression of an inquisitor on his face and arms crossed.

"…"

"Shut up and stop acting like a mother, questioning her daughter's boyfriend!" Iruka hollered, flushed at the humiliation.

"… Notice – it was not me, who implied that you have a relationship."

"NARUTO!" Iruka jumped up, reaching out for the little blond brat, intending to beat him hard, but froze on the spot when he heard Kakashi snickering. At that Naruto simply doubled, laughing.

"Jeez, Iruka, you rock!"

-----

(0) 'La femme fatale' (fr.) - The fatal woman  
(1) "_From 5,606 teams selected from 1,737 universities in 84 countries competing at 183 sites and hundreds more competing at preliminary contests worldwide, eighty-three teams of students competed for bragging rights and prizes at The 30th Annual ACM International Collegiate Programming Contest World Finals sponsored by IBM on April 12,2006, and hosted by Baylor University." _Impressive, ne? It's the most prestigious programming contest on the entire planet. It'll be mentioned further again.  
(2) fr., "You have two messages" 


	7. Partying

** Now, now. No sharp or heavy objects thrown at me. Who'd finish the story if I'm dead? A lot happened since last chapter; too much to say here. The most important, probably, is that with our RozenCreuz cosplay we took the third place at Animatsuri. Wanna see photos - there's a link in my profile (homepage). I'll try to update faster from now on. Sorry for the delay, thank you for comments. The biggest thanks to Adela Nightmoon who keeps on correcting my mistakes.  
**

* * *

**Chapter six. Partying**

"_Now the vibration in the floor  
Is getting closer to the door –  
And -  
Is this the way you  
Let you promise drift away to…"_

_Thousand Foot Krutch "I climb"_

By the next week spring had come into it's full power. Sakura tree's were still blooming and their pinkish petals were all over the streets, coloring the asphalt and tinting the perfect green of grass. The temperature had raised uncharacteristically to twenty three degrees and Naruto abandoned his jacket and numerous tee-shirts for the sake of wildly-colored short-sleeved shirts.

"So-o, what are we doing tonight?" Kiba was practically jumping in his seat, looking eagerly at his friends. They were in a café again, this time absolutely legally, as they'd sat throughout all the lectures and seminars.

"Well, yesterday Iruka showed me that bowling center nearby…" Naruto said uncertainly. He wasn't that sure he wanted to go out that evening at all, even though he hadn't been out even once during the previous week. When in the right mood, he'd be able to party for weeks, but otherwise he was a calm homey type. In the end, the whole fun of clubbing was in its rare happening.

"Bowling?" Kiba glanced at Shikamaru and Chouji, who shrugged simultaneously, showing that they didn't care much. "Sakura and Ino actually said there was something fun going to happen tonight… Like you know…"

"I don't really care. My parents have gone to Kyushu to visit grandma – couldn't wait for the Golden Week – and I'm all alone…" Chouji explained, opening a pack of chips and beginning to eat them.

"You can stay at my place," Shikamaru offered. "My parents wouldn't mind, you know."

"Nah, it's okay. I just don't want to stay home in the evening."

"So – Naruto? Want to go?" Kiba smiled at him and Naruto felt his heart skip a beat.

"Now as I think of it, I seem to have a business meeting this evening…" he lied, speaking the first thing that came into his mind. Everyone proceeded to stare at him.

"A business meeting?! What are you? A secret billionaire? Bill Gates' long lost son?" Kiba's laugh was accompanied by Shika's raised eyebrow and a chip falling to the floor.

"No, why…" the blond blushed, looking away. "I just own a company…"

"A company. Right. Spill, Naruto, you're not getting away with it now. Come to think of it, we still don't know much about you." This was true, however Naruto in reverse knew a lot about his friends – including the source of their families' income.

He inwardly cursed his long tongue and looked around, searching for help. Which, of course, wasn't anywhere nearby.

"There's nothing to talk about, really. I just happened to inherit a company – well, Iruka at the moment is the one running it. There's a whole bunch of guys helping him." He said, choosing words carefully.

"Am I the only one who noticed that while he said a lot, he didn't say anything important?" Kiba asked.

"Oh, come on!"

"If he doesn't want to talk, don't press him, Kiba," Shikamaru supported Naruto. "He said enough."

Kiba che'd but stopped the conversation. Naruto sighed, relieved. He wasn't ashamed of his family's business in any way, he just didn't like to talk about things he had nothing to do with, but still profited from.

"This way or that, what's with the sudden meeting?" Chouji wondered, munching on his chips nonchalantly. Naruto shot him a cautious look. His fa- plump friend didn't look like a brain on legs, but he sure noticed more that he showed.

"Nothing serious, really…" he waved it off, making up lies haphazardly. "Just going to be introduced to my managers. Haven't seen them yet, even though I've been in Tokyo for almost a month." Naruto smiled to his friends and hid behind a mug of coffee.

* * *

"Hey, Naruto, want some tea?" Kakashi shouted from the kitchen. Naruto contemplated the idea for a second, before deciding he did need some rest and shouted back an agreement. 

Kakashi was now a usual guest in their apartment, and Naruto was quite content with it as Iruka seemed to spend more time home, rather than doing some nasty (as he suspected) business day and night. As for the two possibly being more than friends – and come on, what other thoughts could he get seeing Iruka suddenly befriending someone not for a rare glass of beer in a pub, but for constant … what? _Communication?_ - he was far from judging them. Maybe this way – not poking his nose in either Iruka's private life or in business matters – he was getting distant from him… But Naruto was more afraid of being told to not mess with things that didn't concern him than to seem indifferent.

"How's your studying going?" Iruka asked as Kakashi, now quite familiar with their kitchen, served them tea.

"Everything's okay..." Naruto shrugged plopping himself down onto a stool. "Though not too interesting but I guess it's a matter of time."

"University years are your best, not because of your studies, but because of your life outside of the university." Kakashi noted, putting cups of tea before both Iruka and Naruto and settling himself on the counter with a glass of apple juice.

The blond glanced at him before sighing.

"Let's say it's not all as good as it sounds..."

"You don't have any friends?" Kakashi raised an eyebrow and Iruka frowned, because he knew Naruto did.

"It's just that we have some different interests..." he replied and silently corrected himself - '_Their interests are no longer yours_...'

Iruka blinked and Naruto, having caught a confused look in his eyes, decided to change the topic.

"Golden Week is coming closer. Do you have any plans for it?"

"What are you talking about?!" Iruka jumped up in his seat. "Sarutobi-san and Konohomaru are coming for Golden Week!"

Naruto nearly dropped his cup – along with the jaw.

"What?! Why haven't I heard about it?!"

"What?!"

Kakashi laughed at them both and Naruto humphed, feeling stupid.

"Oh, those are our distant relatives. Sarutobi-san used to be Naruto's guardian – before he turned eighteen…"

"What?" Kakashi fell off the counter, and looked unbelievingly up at Iruka. "Naruto is eighteen already?"

Naruto felt offended. Well, he did look younger than he was (mostly because of his height), but not that much, so the fact of him reaching the age of full legal capacity would make a person fall off his seat.

"He is…" confused Iruka looked Naruto over, confirming that yes, he looked as mature as he was.

"What's with me not being eighteen, huh?" Naruto looked down on Kakashi, feeling a frown creep its way onto his face.

"Hehehe…" Kakashi laughed again and stood up. "Nothing, really. You just look too girlish and childish."

Silence rewarded him again, before Iruka asked skeptically,"Girlish?"

Kakashi scratched the back of his head sheepishly and started explaining while Naruto was trying to overcome his utter shock at this statement.

"It's all in the eyes, you know? Unusual shape…"

"Duh! These are the eyes of an average European!" he interrupted in a scandalized tone and added before Kakashi could even continue. "And there're millions of people with blue eyes. Even Japanese."

Iruka nodded, but Kakashi shrugged it off, sliding off the counter, coming up to Naruto and poking an accused finger straight into the matter of discussion – his left eye.

"Not of such intensity, boy."

"Bullshit!"

"Okay, then the hair!" he tugged at a blond lock.

"What's wrong with the freaking hair! Half the nation's been dyeing it blond since the invention of hair dye!"

And then, _of course_, Iruka had to start giggling. Naruto felt his insides freeze, expecting the worst…

"You should have seen him with long hair then!"

"SHUT UP, IRUKA!" he screeched, jumping to his feet, his whole face turning bright red. He wasn't ashamed of having worn long hair only half a year ago, he had been actually quite proud of it, but hell no was he going to be laughed at because of the hairstyle he was no longer wearing!

"Long hair?" Kakashi gave out a hysterical giggle and Naruto lunged at him, intending to beat the laugh out of the policeman. While he was violently (but effortlessly) punching him, Iruka sneaked out of the kitchen to fetch a large photo frame with a picture of Naruto and his three best friends – Konohomaru, Udon and Moegi-chan. Kakashi took just one glance at it and doubled over, laughing uncontrollably.

It was taken a year and a half before, in the middle of Naruto's second year at G. Washington's Private School, the four of them posing in the school yard. Naruto's scarless face was framed by long bangs, the rest of his hair tied in a high ponytail.

"Iruka, you're so dead!" Naruto screeched, reaching out for the frame and abandoning Kakashi for a while. Iruka evaded him easily and held the frame high, making it nearly impossible for short Naruto to reach it.

It would definitely result in a bloody massacre, if hadn't Naruto's cellphone rung suddenly. Panting, he backed away from both Iruka and Kakashi.

"Betrayer! Hello?"

"Naruto? This is Shikamaru."

"Yeah, I know. What's wrong?" by Shika's worried tone he could only assume something was up.

"It's about Kiba… He went to this party he had mentioned and Chouji and I didn't. He called me some time ago; it seems he's pretty drunk… He doesn't like to talk about it, but he's got a rather weird reaction to alcohol… too long to explain. Could you get him from the party? If it's too bothersome, Chouji can come later and take him home…"

"Yeah, sure…" Naruto replied uncertainly. It was a pretty confusing situation for him to get into. "But isn't it more convenient for you, Shika, to fetch him? It'll take me a hell lot of time to get to Gaara's house…" He didn't even want to mention he'd probably get lost half the way there…

"No, he isn't at Gaara's."

"Huh? Where is he then?"

"He's at Sasuke's."

* * *

Naruto fidgeted and knocked on Sasuke's door glancing at his left side, where Kakashi was indifferently scrutinizing the ceiling, a cigarette dangling from his lips. Naruto sniffed unconsciously, feeling nothing as nicotine smoke entered his lungs. He wasn't scared to pay a visit Sasuke alone, he simply wasn't sure he'd be able to take Kiba to his apartment alone. 

The door swung open, revealing a drunk stranger. He didn't even pay attention to the guests, just muttered: "Welcome!" and retreated back into the apartment which was exactly the same as Iruka's, except for being decorated in pure Japanese style. Naruto who had spent the past two and a half years surrounded primarily by foreigners and studying in an American school, felt a sudden wave of agoraphobia, as the apartment suddenly felt too large for him.

Kakashi and he exchanged looks and entered the apartment. There were two or three people in the hall, somewhere wildly beating J-pop was leaking out as a soft murmur. No one paid attention to them as they made their way to the living room, much more crowded than the hall. Unfortunately, there wasn't a single familiar face there.

"What are _you_ doing here?!" A surprised voice asked him and Naruto turned around to face none other than Sasuke, whose eyes bulged out at his outfit. Yeah, he should have changed his fluffy rabbits' shaped house shoes to something more appropriate, but he was in a hurry! Sasuke regained his cold appearance and continued, "You weren't invited."

"Even if I was, I wouldn't have come!" Naruto spat back, unable to control a wave of irritation rising from withing the depths of himself. "Who'd want to visit this shitty par-"

"We came for our friend, Kiba." Kakashi interrupted softly.

"Who? Ah, that moron who came with Ino and Sakura? They're in the guestroom. Take him and get out." Sasuke led them out of the living room and through the hall. On the way Naruto heard some other music joined J-pop. It was something familiar and he nearly smacked himself on the forehead – how couldn't he instantly recognize his favorite song of all time, "The Unforgiven II" by Metallica? In high school he had even went as far as to sing it at a Christmas party!

Deep in his thought, he didn't notice Sasuke stop and therefore bumped into him. Kakashi – that old pervert! –pretended not to notice as well and bumped into Naruto sending the two crashing on the floor. Somehow while falling Sasuke bumped his head against the wall…

"You want me dead, don't you?" he winced, holding his injured head. "Get off me!"

They managed to get up – Naruto threw Kakashi a look promising a slow and painful death as soon as they got home – and entered the guestroom. The music instantly became louder. Having seen Kiba, Naruto realized instantly why Shikamaru was so worried. No one was watching him, thinking the drunk boy had just fallen asleep, but Naruto saw how unnaturally pale and sick he looked. He was so startled by the sight of him, that didn't notice the surroundings before Temari - present in the room along with Sakura, Ino and Gaara – shouted:

"That's her! That's the Fox I've been talking about!"

And only then did he look at them, seeing that they all were sitting in front of a laptop, watching a video. A very familiar video. Naruto felt like ripping his hair out. Fox! The Fox that she'd been talking about! God gracious!

"_Come lay beside me, this won't hurt I swear  
She loves me not, she loves me still, but she'll never love again"_

Raspy voice was mimicking one of James Hetfield, loose blond hair were hiding young face from the world… and all the imperfections of this certain record were known to Naruto too well…

_"She lay beside me, but she'll be there when I'm gone  
Black heart scarring darker still, yet she'll be there when I'm gone  
Yes she'll be there when I'm gone  
Dead sure she'll be there"_

"What the hell is this?" Sasuke, not interested anymore in Naruto, came up to the company sprawled on the bed and peered at the screen. The camera was focused on the vocalist, a certain blonde shortie in school uniform singing hoarsely. On the background a short-haired Japanese kid was playing the drums, while on the left and right sides of the vocalist a red-haired girl and a dark-haired European boy were playing guitars, all in the same school uniform and with goggles on their foreheads.

"A friend from Kyoto sent this video to me, he said Fox was a member of this school band – it's actually called 'Nine-tailed Fox'!" The chorus had ended by that time and the red-haired girl stepped forward, playing solo. "That's her, that's her!"

_"Lay beside me, tell me what I've done  
The door is closed, so are your eyes  
But now I see the sun, now I see the sun  
Yes, now I see it" _

Camera gave a close shot on the vocalist's face, eyes closed and hidden behind long blond bangs. Naruto, whose eyes were darting between Kiba and the screen, heard Kakashi snicker softly and say, almost to himself:

"Which '_her_', I wonder…"

Then the video ended abruptly, leaving a triumphant Temari and her confused peers staring at it.

"It might have been some random video, you know…"

"No, that's a true one. And know what? Fox is actually coming to Tokyo!"

"I don't believe in your Fox anyway. If you look at the girl in the video, she's no more than fourteen. How on Earth can she be a drifter?" Sasuke reasoned.

"The video is almost two years old."

"Doesn't matter. According to the legend, she was a drifter at that time." Inwardly, tears of happiness were streaming down Naruto's face. He was up to falling on his knees and praising the almighty Uchiha, but Kakashi nudged him slightly and pointed at Kiba.

"Hehe, have a nice evening!" Naruto and Kakashi took Kiba and started making their way to the door, when the room occupants finally noticed them.

"Naruto! Say, have you ever seen that Fox girl?"

He stopped dead in his track and quickly – too quickly – said:

"No. Maybe once. Or twice. But from afar and not really!" He started laughing sheepishly. "See, I think Kiba is really not okay at all. Have to take him home now."

As they were leaving the room, he heard Gaara speak,

"When this praised Okinawa drifter come we'll see what she's worth."

Naruto gulped and, avoiding Kakashi's interested gaze, moved on.

"Didn't know your voice could be so hoarse."

"Had to drink a hell lot of cold water to make it like this..."

* * *

(1) Average temperature in April in Tokyo is 18 C.  
(2) Stereotypes say Japanese people are dark-eyed and black-haired. Not so often, but Japanese can also be blue-eyed (remember 'Memoirs of Geisha'? In the book it is written that Chiyo-san is blue-eyed) and red-haired.  
(3) Okinawa, again, is the resort area of Japan. There are a lot of tourists. Also, a lot of former military men live there – mostly Americans, those who stayed in Japan after WWII(4) Agoraphobia – here, fear of open spaces. 


	8. Backward glances

**My dear readers, I love you! For you reviews especially, since they reached 100 - whoo-hoo! Sorry for not replying - absolutely no time. This chap is unbetaed, 'cause I wanted to give you a little X-mas present - for THIS X-mas. As for me, I'm retreating to study Criminal Law as I have an exam tomorrow. Probably, you will hear from me shortly after the New Year, and then only in mid-February. Happy holidays to you all!**

* * *

**Chapter seven  
Backward glances**

"…_and now I'm dancing in the ashes  
And there's no one else around._  
'_Cause I wanna be part of something.  
This is just a story of a broken soul."  
Papa Roach "Take me"_

_Naha, G. Washington Private School, End of April, 2004 (two years prior)_

"Okay, kids, let's welcome a new member to our little family," Miss Wagner, a petite old woman with slight German accent to her otherwise perfect English hugged him and pushed forward. "Say a bit about yourself, Nathan."

Не stood before them, white shirt buttoned up to the top and red plaid tie perfectly tied up, usually loose and thus messy bangs clipped back. He looked like a perfect British student, prude and efficient, even numerous ear piercings couldn't strain this image. Nervous, the only thing he came up with, was a correction.

"It's Naruto. Uzumaki Naruto." someone chuckled, catching similarity with ever so famous "_Bond. James Bond_" and he, solely on reflex, bowed and mumbled,"どうぞよろしく。"

"Na-ruto, we don't speak Japanese in school." Miss Wagner corrected, smiling wearily. "Now take your seat, dear."

"はい、先生。。。I mean, yes, ma'am." He kept himself in tact this time and didn't bow, only walked to the farthest seat in sight and sat quietly there, deep red spread all over his face. So far Naruto had not once proudly proclaimed that he hated Japan and everything connected with it, including the language. Now he proved to be more of a Japanese man than he ever thought.

* * *

"Ready?" Kakashi knocked slightly on the doorframe to alert Naruto. 

"Already?" the teen perked up, glancing at the alarm clock on the floor by his bed. "Two minutes!"

Kakashi smiled and pointed downwards before leaving.

"Iruka, are you sure we can leave you like this?" he shouted, running around the room in socks and a shirt in search of clean jeans.

"Stop the hysterics, Naruto, and leave already!" Iruka shouted back. He had caught flu and couldn't get out of the bed yet; Kakashi was the one to drive Naruto to Narita airport to meet uncle Sarutobi and Konohomaru. Despite all the preparations he had made, everything was in a mess – somehow dust drifted back to its place despite the cleaning and washed clothes disappeared without any trace.

"Kay, I'm leaving! Be a good boy!" Naruto shouted, absolutely sure, that if only Iruka was anywhere near, he'd throw something heavy at him.

He ran down the stairs all twenty two floors, unable to keep the excess of energy under control. Kakashi's leaf-green Volkswagen Bug (an insult to his status of a fancy policeman) was parked near his motorcycle, but today they were going to take Iruka's Subaru.

They got into the car and drove out of the parking lot. Naruto spotted Uchiha's Mercedes, but didn't even spare a scowl this time – so nervous he was.

"So these are your uncle and cousin." Kakashi stated soon after they left the center of Tokyo.

"Not exactly," he started explaining, twisting his ear slightly – a habit he had got when both his ears were pierced. Slightly noticeable holes felt relieving under the touch. Silence – even filled with music – was getting at him and Naruto was glad to have a conversation. "Uncle Sarutobi was my grandmother's sister's second husband. We're not related by blood… But until I turned eighteen this autumn, he was taking care of me. I am not exactly familiar with the legalities... I suppose he might have adopted me, because they even changed my family name to his."

"Aw." Kakashi took attention off the road to glance at him. "Then Iruka is your…"

"No one. Just a family friend. Sort of an older brother. He wanted to take me after grandpa died, but they didn't allow him because of…" Naruto paused, not knowing how to continue. Because Iruka was under a trial at the moment, yes, but could he tell Kakashi this?

"I know," the policeman reassured him. Then the curiosity stroke again.

"You must have been really close back then if you ended living together."

Naruto chuckled.

"It's an old and long story. And quite a boring one, I can add."

"Well," Kakashi nodded in direction of the traffic jam ahead. "We have a lot of time."

"Then… How should I start? With an introduction, probably." He felt secure around the grey-haired man and didn't mind telling him what he had avoided telling Kiba, Shikamaru and Chouji. It was strange… "Everyone refers to me as to Uzumaki Naruto, but the birth certificate actually says my name is Nathan. Don't laugh! It was my grandfather's wish. The old geezer swung from one edge to another. One day he orders me to wear yukata and dye my hair black, the other he calls me Nathan and teaches Swedish. But I like "Naruto" more; this is how my father called me."

"Wow."

"Yeah."

"So how did you move in with Iruka?" Kakashi reminded.

"Mmm, he was my dad's friend – though he's a bit younger. Actually, until I graduate, he's the one ruling family business." Naruto sighed, thinking that he'd rather not graduate ever at all.

"You mean that 'Zuzu Inc.' monster?"

"God, don't remind, please." Naruto moaned and tried to think of something brighter than the awaiting doom. Something bright… and connected with Konohomaru.

* * *

_Naha, June 2004_

"Sarutobi Nathan, Sarutobi Konohomaru, McMaster Megan and Ford Donald – please attend the principal's office. I repeat: Sarutobi Nathan…" Naruto raised eyes to heaven ad stood up, silently asking the teacher's permission to leave.

"What did you do this time?" the teacher moaned, but Naruto saw curiosity sparkling in his eyes. He made an offended face.

"I? Did something? It must be a mistake!"

The class burst into laughter, Naruto squared his shoulders and left.

In the corridor leading to the principal's office he met the other three. Moegi-chan was peeping into the key-hole of the cabinet's door. He shook hands with Udon and Konohomaru, who were leaning against the wall opposite the door and admiring their friend's rear.

"What's happening?" he asked them worriedly, glancing at the watch. "It's not time yet. Could they have found the construction?"

"Nah," Udon replied, fixing his glasses. "There seems to be an official of some sort inside, right, Moegi-chan? Seems, we're not going to be lectured."

Moegi-chan tore herself off the door and shook Naruto's hand. As soon as she did the door burst open, revealing the principal and his guests – two women of admirable appearances. Naruto heard Udon inhale loudly at the sight of one's bosom and stepped forward, smiling widely.

"お早うございます、先生！"His cheerful salutation was followed by an echo of "Good morning, professor!" from his friends. The principle that had not once seen the performance closed his eyes, silently pleading for mercy.

"I thought you said there are only English-speaking kids at school…" The elder woman of the two, the blonde with hair fixed in two pigtails said confusedly.

"It is true." The principle sounded like he was on the verge of dying. "Don't pay attention, I brought them for another reason altogether."

Naruto perked up inwardly and felt his friends do the same, though on the outside they didn't look any different from the moment before.

"Those four," he said firmly, pointing at them, "are the spawns of the Devil. The most cunning and sly creatures on the face of the planet and on the schoolgrounds precisely."

The blonde raised her eyebrows, while the second woman, a short Japanese, just eyed them skeptically. Naruto felt proud. A month and a half of hard work – and voila! – he's proclaimed the biggest prankster out there! His three followers also radiated pompousness. But Naruto scolded his features and blinked several times innocently.

"I not understand what you say, sensei." He said wit an awful accent, a shy smile plastered on his face. Moegi-chan, Udon and Konohomaru supported him with a chorus of protest.

"Nah, that's not true!"

"How can you say that?"

"When was the last time we did anything wrong?"

But the principal ignored them and turned to the blonde again.

"Don't listen to the brats, they can pull any act. Just… know whom to blame if anything happens in my absence," He then turned to the four. "Now get out."

The friends left the room, Naruto didn't forget to bow politely, making the principal's eyebrow twitch. Before the door closed, the blonde sent them all a reassuring smile – like, don't worry, guys, who's gonna listen to the old geezer?

They were halfway to their classrooms, when the WC on the second floor exploded.

* * *

They strode towards the arrival halls slowly, still talking. 

"…so that's how my dad and Iruka became friends."

Kakashi laughed and patted Naruto's shoulder encouragingly.

"What programming? You should become a writer, boy." Naruto smiled at him, searching the display for the flight from Lugano.

"They're coming from exit C over… there," after that they made their way through the crowd, their conversation ceased for a while. At the designated exit, where people already waited for their relatives and friends, even though the landing of the plane hadn't been announced yet. Naruto bought himself a can of coke and offered to Kakashi.

"Hey, maybe you'll get me some beer and drive us back youself?" he suggested, distaste written all over his face at the sight of the bright-red can. Naruto frowned – they had discussed the matter previously, when he asked the policeman to drive him to the airport. He didn't go as far as to reveal his story, but lied he didn't know how to drive a car. Why then…?

"I don't drive, I told you," he reminded warily.

Kakashi smirked and rolled eyes.

"Ah, come on, I saw your driving license".

"That's for motorcycles!" Naruto tried to fight off without a second thought, but the excuse was weak and even a stranger not knowing Naruto at all could say he was lying.

"Kid, I am a police officer. Whom are you kidding?"

"Kakashi," Naruto sighed, "I am not driving and this is final. I promise to tell you why, but later, okay?" and indeed, he wanted to tell someone rather than Iruka the whole pitiful and downright stupid story.

Kakashi sighed and patted his shoulder. "I'm not going to rush into your little clean world in dirty boots, boy…"

Naruto snickered. Little clean world?

* * *

_Naha, October 2004_

"No," Tsunade said firmly, relaxing in her chair. Naruto jumped in his seat and cried out.

"But why? It won't take you anything, just…"

"Naruto, do you have at least a spoon of brain in your thick skull?" she leaned over the desk and knocked on his head. A hollow sound responded. "Just as I thought."

"Oh, shut up!" he hid face in his palms, muttering quietly. "It's my dream, do you understand? My dream. And now, as it is within my reach, I am denied the right to grasp it!"

"Naruto, Sarutobi-san cares about you and…"

"Don't you dare speaking about care, woman!" he shouted, staring angrily at her. He was so outraged all of a sudden, that Tsunade didn't even respond to the 'woman' part. "I could understand if he didn't let me to take part in the damn contest – I wouldn't have agreed, anyway, but still – but, but… But he told me to go ahead! And made the commission nullify my application behind my back! It's dirty! It's unfair!" Naruto was on the verge of crying. The school principal sighed heavily.

"Naruto, where did you get the scars?" she asked quietly. He looked up and she repeated. "Where did you get the scars on your cheeks, boy? I know it's a lie about you being scarified."

The blond winced, avoiding looking in her eyes.

"In August… I was training for the race and – there was this trouble with the brakes… I fell face flat on the ground and the eyeshield of my helmet didn't take the impact and shattered."

"Does Sarutobi-san know?" she asked carefully.

"Yeah."

"You could have died."

"Yeah."

"And you still want to take part in that whatever-it-is of yours? Want to put your life on stake? Depend on the brakes of your falling apart motorcycle?" Tsunade studied his face and he nodded under her scrutinizing stare.

"It is my dream. I will pursue it no matter what. No matter what. Please, Tsunade-baachan, help me. Grandpa did an unfair thing – I… I can understand that he's worried, but it's my life. _My_, not his. I think it is for me to decide, not for him."

"You're still a minor, Naruto," she commented dryly, not letting even a hint of emotion be reflected in her voice.

In response Naruto smiled wearily and shuddered.

"Participants must be in between of sixteen and eighteen. And I _do_ have Grandpa Sarutobi's written permission."

"You're still fifteen!" Tsunade frowned.

"No, already no."

She blinked, not understanding and then gasped as realization dawned on her. She stood up hastily and ran around the table to hug him.

"Oh, God, happy birthday, Naruto, dear, happy birthday! Why didn't you tell, you, stupid brat!"

"Please," he whispered in her shoulder, relaxing in her embrace and hugging her back, "please, Tsunade-baachan, help me. I want it so much…"

She didn't reply, only hugged him tighter and started sobbing.

That evening the dormitory of G. Washington Private School got completely trashed. Kids celebrated the school's biggest prankster Uzumaki Naruto's sixteenth birthday. Naruto and his three friends had one more occasion to celebrate.

* * *

(1) Lugano – a city in Switzerland, 'pearl' of Italian part of the country 


End file.
